French Wanker - Victoria Pinder Page 0,43

widened, and he tilted his head as he analyzed me. “So, you changed your mind?”

I smiled and ran my hand through my dark hair. “I… yeah. I’m not returning to Paris. I’m staying here.”

His glare spoke volumes. “Your heart is in being a fucking a doctor.”

I spoke slowly and deliberately. “And I’m taking over a local practice. The people in my town need medical help.”

His shoulders relaxed, and he scooted backward in his chair. “So, you’re retiring to country life and keeping the stethoscope.”

“I became a doctor to help people. It’s the only thing I know how to do.”

“And Kara?”

I ignored how tense I got and said, “She’s gone.”

Simon finished his coffee and then tapped the table. “You called and told her how you feel?”

“It doesn’t matter. She was clear; I was only a vacation for her,” I said as I remembered her letter in my wallet.

Simon’s family, including children’s voices were heard, and we both stood to leave. “Take a chance and put your heart on the line.”

I stared at the wall as it made talking easier. “I can’t disappoint her, too, like I did with Cecilia and Blake.”

“Blake?”

I slumped into the seat next to him and kept my head down. “I left the life vest on and dropped it in our garage. I should have left it in the boat.”

He tapped my knee. “You were a kid. He knew it was there.”

He’d known? I squeezed my eyes shut, and I was six again and running with my friends, wearing the life vest. “If I’d not been careless, he’d be alive.”

Voices outside grew closer, but Simon leaned closer and kept his voice down. “If he’d been patient, we’d have gone back to your house and gotten it. He knew it was in the garage and didn’t care.”

My voice cracked. “He did?”

“Simon?” Bridget called.

Simon jumped up. “I was there. I spent years with that guilt.”

I stood, but it was like a small weight fell off my back. “He’d not want that.”

He gave me a once-over. “Look, I have to go. But if you need to talk more, I’m open.”

“Thanks.” We flung the door open, and a young boy jumped into his arms and hugged him. Bridget joined him, holding two little girls’ hands.

“Glad you stopped by,” I said.

“Call anytime,” he said and then greeted his daughters.

I backed away from the family reunion. My heart twisted; I’d never have that.

And I wasn’t in the mood to talk about my brother today.

Blake was a ghost in my life these days.

So had been Cecilia.

I headed back to my small house as my parents took their guests to my brother’s grave.

The walk was short, but as I opened the door, the lights were on in the kitchen. I headed inside and saw my grandmother cutting onions and tossing them in a hot frying pan. I went and kissed her cheek. “Grand-mére, what are you doing here?”

“Checking on you,” she said and blushed as I hugged her.

I took out the potatoes and began to peel them as I told her about my day. “I agreed to be the town’s local doctor, so you’ll be seeing me whenever you need something.”

She put the chicken on the hot pan and closed the lid. “I trust you as long as you stop being so melancholy.”

I continued peeling more potatoes and putting them in the water. “I thought I was taking a turn for the better now.”

She stopped taking out the spices. “I want to meet this Kara.”

I playfully bumped into her shoulder. Grand-mére seemed smaller now than I remembered. “She’s in America. Want to fly to Pittsburgh?”

She gave me a pointed look and picked up her spices to mix in a bowl. “I’ll go and hold your hand if you need me to.”

I put my finished potatoes on the stove. “What are you talking about?”

She let out a long sigh and added her spices to the chicken she’d mixed. She once said it was better to mix them together. “You were spoiled all your life I suppose and too coddled. Cecilia loved spending your money, which was why she never complained about her health. And if we’re being honest, you were far too good-looking for your own good.”

I glanced at the pot. “That’s not polite.”

I chopped some carrots, and she cupped my cheeks. “You didn’t learn that sometimes you need to chase a woman if she’s important to you.”

I added the pieces to the lunch being prepared. “Kara was special.”

She bounced on her feet. “If that’s true, then