He got to his feet and went to the sink, and filled a glass from the tap. He stayed there, leaning against the counter, watching her.
“Do you think you’re the only one who’s gone through a transformation? You talk about my ego? Is change your personal territory? I’ve been in prison. Do you have any idea what that’s like? And it’s worse when you know you shouldn’t be there. The only good thing? I had time to reflect, and I didn’t like what I found. I don’t know how long I’ll be free. For that matter, I don’t know how long I’ll be alive. I’d like to do this so I can feel good about something in my life before I lose it again, one way or the other.”
Tracy was surprised at her rush of emotion. She wasn’t falling for everything CJ said. She was no fool. But she couldn’t discount it all, either. Victorville was not Club Fed, and she was sure her ex-husband’s sojourn there had been traumatic. Maybe it had been enlightening, as well. Who was she to determine whether he was telling at least some of the truth?
Score one for CJ, then. But how about Marsh? What would he say if he discovered CJ was looking into developing Happiness Key in accordance with the conservation easement? She could just imagine the fireworks.
She had one man, her ex-husband, who swore he wanted to take care of her and one who was busy taking care of his own ex-wife. The irony wasn’t lost on her.
“So you’ve been checking out possibilities?” she said. “That’s what you’ve been doing out here?”
“I wanted to have something on paper to show you. I’ve got enough information now to draw that up. Do you want me to?” He set his glass on the counter. “I am a developer, or was. And I know this property as well as I knew my childhood backyard. I’m your man for this.”
“You won’t be my man for anything else,” she cautioned. “I’m not interested in a reunion. We weren’t good for each other when we were married. We wouldn’t be good for each other now. And there’s another man in my life….” Or had been until tonight.
“Not one worthy of you.” He held up his hand when she started to protest. “You’re a class act, Tracy, and always were. Sure, you were young when we got married, immature and maybe a little spoiled. But you were special, too special to waste yourself on a man who’s running a nothing little environmental organization because he can’t make the grade anywhere else.”
Despite herself, she rose to Marsh’s defense. “If that’s the way things are going to go here, please don’t come back. My personal life is off-limits.”
“I just don’t want you to make another mistake.”
“Meaning I made one the first time?”
“Undoubtedly. And I made one when I lost you.” He held up his hand again. “But I did lose you. I know that. Just let me see what I can do for you. It’ll help us both, and give me something to do while I wait and see what’s happening in California.”
“Nobody’s going to believe this.”
“Does that mean you’ll let me put something together?”
She tried but failed to see how that could hurt. Besides, CJ’s involvement would annoy Marsh no end, and right now, that seemed a plus—even though it also proved she was not as mature as she’d hoped.
She rose. “We’ll see how it goes.”
“I’d like to poke around in the daylight a bit, if that’s okay. You’ll let the renters know they don’t have to worry if they see me around?”
“They aren’t just renters. They’re my friends. All of them.”
He seemed amused. “I’ll remember that.”
“We take care of each other. I’m warning you.”
He gave a mock half salute. “I’ve been warned.”
Tracy walked him to the door. The wine was untouched on the table, but as far as she was concerned, they were finished for the night.
He paused. “It really is good to see you again.” Then, before she could stop him, he leaned down and kissed her cheek.
He was on his way out to the road before she tried to summon a response. Even then, she wasn’t sure anything could adequately explain the way she felt. She finally just closed the door.
chapter nine
On Monday morning CJ arrived just in time for coffee. Tracy was sleepily fumbling to fill her new single shot coffeemaker when he tapped on her front door, then