Floored - Karla Sorensen Page 0,75

at Jude. Definitely at his asshole parents.

The anger was what was in the slowly growing vibration of my body. It reminded me of when Logan first married Paige. I'd sit on the kitchen island while she made homemade pasta. It was a mess. Noodles hanging everywhere as they dried. But my favorite part, aside from the eating, was watching the water start to boil.

No matter what the temperature of the water was when she set it over the flames, it always started the same way. Tiny little dots, hardly visible, as they moved in dancing lines up to the surface. The dots grew, but only if you were watching very carefully. And that was my job, watch for the big bubbles that finally made the water churn angrily.

Right now, I was the pot of boiling water, and the moment someone lifted the lid, I was probably going to friggin’ explode in a mess of tears and hormones and tight-lidded tension.

Isabel tightened her hold on my hand. As different as the four of us girls were, one thing we had in common was that we were very calm and collected. Until we weren't so calm and collected. Then we needed to get the F away from everyone because all the feelings were about to explode in a messy burst. Until Logan, we'd learned to keep those feelings locked down tight because our mom just ... couldn't be bothered.

"Almost there," she murmured.

I nodded but felt the tingling at the bridge of my nose, the burning press at the back of my eyes.

I tried to focus on the lights, the architecture, the arches on doorways and beautiful columns in rows, anything to keep Jude's voice out of my head as he spoke to his parents.

My eyes pinched shut.

"We're here, Lee," Isabel whispered. I got out of the cab while she handed over a crumpled wad of pounds through the window. "Keep the change."

He whistled. "Cheers."

With her arm wrapped around my shoulders, we ascended the steps into the hotel and made our way through the quiet lobby to the small elevator. Everything—hands, arms, chin—was shaking by the time Isabel got the door open. The first tear was hot on my cheeks. The second came down more easily. My teeth were chattering by the time she had us inside.

"Holy shit," I gasped, tears slipping immediately down my face. "Oh, holy shit, did you hear them? How they spoke to each other? I didn't know about any of this, Isabel."

“I heard,” she said slowly. “That was … that was brutal, Lia.” She pulled off her coat and laid it over the chair by the desk as she shook her head. "I thought we had some awkward family dynamics."

I laughed, but the sound that came out was pathetic and watery. I pressed both hands to my chest and tried to breathe down my rising panic.

"I c-can't do this," I stammered. "I am not ready to do this."

Isabel stood in front of me, sliding her hands up and down my upper arms. "Look at me, let's take a couple of deep breaths, okay? In through the nose."

I did as she asked, but my inhales were shaky and my exhales quick.

"Do you think selfishness i-is genetic?" I asked on a choked sob. "Like, is little peach totally, royally fucked because I come from Brooke, and J-Jude and his parents—" my voice broke.

"No," she interrupted. "No, you don't even go there in your mind, okay?"

"How are you so sure, though? It's not like people try to screw up their kids. He and I haven't talked about anything important. W-We just ... ignored it all, and I don't know how you're so sure we'll be able to do this."

Isabel's eyes got suspiciously bright, but she blinked a few times, and it disappeared. "The reason I'm so sure is because selfish people don't wonder if they're selfish. They do what they please and don't think about the consequences of their actions. Brooke left us because she thought she'd be happier. She thought life would be easier without us. And fuck that ho, she was probably right. We were little savages sometimes, but I guarantee you she never worried about what damage she left behind, because she was—is—selfish to her core." Isabel pressed her forehead to mine, wrapping me in a tight hug. "You are not like her because right now, after something hard, you're worried about what this means. You will be an amazing mother, okay?"

"Okay." I squeezed her back, letting the