First degree - By David Rosenfelt Page 0,46

the driveway. I persist trying until they move, since I know if I relent and park on the street, I'll have given up the driveway for the duration.

As I get out of the car, I am swarmed by the reporters, all asking me if it's true that Laurie claims Dorsey is still alive and has phoned her. I decline to comment and with some difficulty make it through the horde and into the house.

Laurie, Kevin, and Edna are in the den watching television. The few afternoon news programs are having a field day with Laurie's claim of having spoken to Dorsey. Despite the seriousness of the situation, the ridicule has already begun. After pointing out that DNA results have confirmed the charred, headless body to be Dorsey's, one amused newscaster takes mock offense and says, "I thought we were the only talking heads around here."

Laurie is furious at the treatment she is getting, and I can't say I blame her. I have little doubt that Dylan leaked the story, and it's a public relations triumph for him. I should have been the one to take this public. Allowing Dylan to frame the issue has the effect of making Laurie look (a) desperate, (b) crazy, (c) guilty, (d) ridiculous, and (e) all of the above. Since the public is by definition the jury pool, it's not a good position for us to be in.

I can go to Hatchet and complain, and since he's not the most media-friendly judge around, he might sympathize with my position. However, it's beyond his power to erase what the public already knows, so all he could do is issue a gag order on the case from this point on. I'm not ready to advocate that; I still think there's more to be gained than lost in the public relations battle. I'm just not doing a very good job of it.

To that end, I conduct a press conference on the steps of the house. My intent is to openly acknowledge Laurie's claim that Dorsey is alive; at this point there is nothing to be gained by denying it. I point out that we did not try to take advantage of it in any way. We simply went to the police to ask for the investigation it deserved. Instead of focusing on that, they've seen fit to release it to the press.

"The district attorney's office is conducting a search for advantage, not for truth" is how I sum it up.

After my impromptu statement has concluded, I invite questions. The first one is from a woman representing the Newark Star-Ledger. It begins with, "Assuming your client got this phone call--"

I interrupt her. "She got the phone call. She is a truthful person, as you will come to know. What you should already know is that nothing would be gained by our making this up. There was absolutely no possibility the police or prosecution would believe it without adequate and independent proof. We had hoped and expected they would look for such proof, rather than create a media circus designed to make my client look foolish."

I take about five questions, making sure that every one of my answers includes an attack on the prosecution. I'm hoping to defuse the impact of today's revelation on the evening news, and once I've done the best I can in that regard, I go back into the house.

A couple of hours later we sit around the television and find out that my front porch salvo was too little too late. Laurie continues to take hits and ridicule, and while my protestations are included, they are given short shrift.

Laurie and I have been going to bed fairly early each night. For her it seems as if being asleep is considerably less painful than being awake. When we are awake, we don't want to talk only about the case, but there's absolutely nothing else that we can focus on. So we've been in bed by ten, and then, unable to sleep, I've been getting up at midnight or later to strategize and figure out my next steps.

Tonight is slightly different. Tonight we make love for the first time since this nightmare began. Laurie instigates it, and it is one of the most intensely passionate encounters I have ever experienced. There is a "deck of the Titanic" urgency that is at the same time frightening and wonderful. And afterward I do something I didn't think possible.

I sleep through the night.

The most important thing I do when working