for just that purpose. I went there with him, like a total whore. I gave him a blow job, and went to bed with him. We had sex all afternoon. It was consensual. When it was over, he said he’d call my agent in the morning and give us a great contract with a huge advance, but he wanted to meet me again. He suggested we meet once a week. He called Carson in the morning and gave me a slightly better contract, not a great one. I took the contract and signed it. I never went back again. I stayed away from him, and I didn’t tell Carson. But I knew exactly what I was and what I’d done. I’d prostituted myself to get ahead. I had felt like a slut and had behaved like one. There are a million guys out there like these, waiting to jump on young women, using sex to make their deals. And some of us are dumb enough to buy into it. I never did it again, but I never forgot what I did. So I’m not so lily pure either. And I did it willingly. You didn’t. You were raped.
“The publisher I had sex with was fired a few years later, and went to another publishing house. He’s probably still playing the same game if he can get anyone to fall for it twenty years later. There’s always Viagra if he can’t get it up. He’s probably seventy-five or eighty by now. There are guys like that in every line of work, and women who fall for it like I did. But those women are speaking up now. They’re blowing the whistle on these creeps. That’s the only way it’s going to stop. Women have a stake in the game now. Men in Hollywood, big men, are losing their jobs, their careers, their TV shows, their parts in movies. Some of them will probably go to prison. It’s going to cost them big-time and it should. I was stupid, and lost my integrity momentarily, but you were a victim, Hattie. I want you to go after the guy and put your name on that list. I’ll stand beside you all the way.”
“I can’t do it,” Hattie said, sounding strangled, as the two sisters fell into each other’s arms and cried for each other. “I’m so sorry that guy did that to you,” she said to Melissa.
“He didn’t do it. I did. I went to his apartment with him, like a cheap trick he picked up on the street. As I said, I never told Carson. I was afraid he’d be disgusted with me. He was the head of a respected publishing house. Guys like him have won for years. But they’re not winning now. They’re losing everything, just as they should.” Hattie looked at her mournfully, and Melissa made her a cup of tea and handed it to her. They’d been talking for hours and it was getting late.
“I should go soon. I was going to talk to Mother Elizabeth tomorrow. I don’t want to keep it a secret from her anymore. I don’t belong in the convent. My motives were never pure. I was only thinking of myself.”
“Your motives were entirely pure. Stop saying that. Steinberg’s the sinner here, not you.”
It was a wicked world and they’d both been victims of it. It was too late for Melissa to make the publisher accountable, she didn’t even know if he was still alive and he had probably retired and it no longer mattered. It was ancient history and she’d given up writing. But it wasn’t too late for Hattie, and she wanted her to speak up, and add her name to the list of the victims. He had cost Hattie a promising career and wounded her deeply.
“I’ll talk to Mother Elizabeth about it, and see what she thinks,” was all she’d agree to. And she didn’t want to embarrass the convent. She left a few minutes later, after Melissa hugged her tight again and told her she loved her. She felt drained when Hattie left, and she wanted to think about everything they’d said. She was heartbroken over Hattie’s story, but it finally explained why she had gone into the convent so hurriedly. They’d both been religious as children, but Hattie had never wanted to be a nun as a young girl. It had never made sense to Melissa before, but now it did. She was a classic victim in