A Filthy Christmas (Filthy Line #6) - Jaxson Kidman Page 0,40

was this burning inside me. For him to realize who I was and who he was.

Again, it was my chance to hit him. Kick him in the balls. Beat his ass into the ground.

Or just simply walk away.

“Let me buy you that drink, Lita,” he whispered. “And more.”

He touched my cheek with the back of his hand.

I nodded.

We were on our second drink.

“Remember that night the guy wouldn’t pay us?” Blaze asked, already laughing.

I smiled. “Yeah. I remember.”

“That fucker put a tip bucket out and there was, what, ten bucks in there? After he agreed to pay us two hundred for the show.”

“He was so shady though.”

“I know. We should have known better.”

“We were young and dumb,” I said.

“I got him though. Remember? I poured the bucket of money over his head and then punched the bucket.”

“Yeah, but you messed up your middle knuckle and couldn’t play guitar for two weeks.”

Blaze slapped the bar and laughed. “God, that was fun, Lita. We spent two weeks holed up in that shitty apartment. Watching movies, drinking, taking pills… having sex…”

I smiled. “Yeah. I was there.”

“You were there,” he said. He reached for my hand. “You were always there, Lita. I took advantage of it. I got lost in what I wanted to be. What I thought I was. I’m not that person anymore.”

“So, this is your apology tour?” I asked.

“Whatever you want me to do,” he said. “I’ll get on a stage and tell everyone what I did to you. I won’t hide from it. It was just too easy. The women, I mean. I’m sorry.”

“I made it too easy,” I said.

“Yeah, you kind of did. I think I was begging to get caught.”

“Why?”

“To change up the routine,” he said. “I thought I wasn’t happy with you. But I wasn’t happy with myself.”

“And you are now?”

“Hell no, Lita. But when I saw you…” Blaze shook his head. “Never mind.”

“Tell me,” I said as I touched his arm.

He looked at my hand, then at me. “I want to fucking kiss you so bad right now.”

“Tell me…”

“When I saw you with that guy… I just knew.”

“You knew?”

“Yeah, Lita. I knew. The way he grabbed you and kissed you. He was touching my spots on you. Kissing my lips on you. You know? It just got to me. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Then I saw you again. And tonight… you know what? I wanted him to hit me. I wanted him to punch me. As hard as he could. That’s how he wanted to solve it? Fine. I took the punch. For you, Lita. Because the three of us knew what was going to happen. He was going to walk out alone and I was going to walk out with you.”

Again, the words went through me.

Blaze winked at me.

Then he leaned toward me. “So how about that kiss?”

He shut his eyes and puckered up his lips.

My right hand grabbed my glass and I smashed it against his head.

He jumped up and tripped over the barstool and went down to the floor.

“What the fuck?” he screamed.

I pointed down to him. “You will never get to kiss me again, you cheating piece of shit. Who the fuck do you think you are? It doesn’t work this way. You… you don’t know how to kiss. Fucking you is like putting a quarter into a cheap, motel vibrating bed. And you eat pussy like you’re afraid your tongue is going to get bit off. Which might be the case with some of the whores you hang out with. Stay the fuck away from me and the man I love. Asshole.”

The bar erupted into applause for me.

Just for good measure, I kicked him in the balls.

Blaze cried out and rolled to his left, his hand cupping his balls.

Before leaving, I grabbed his glass and took a sip.

I spit it back out.

He couldn’t even drink whiskey straight.

What a fucking loser.

The man I loved knew how to drink, fuck, go down on me, and make me happy.

I called Abby and she came to pick me up.

She had a badass little sports car that was blood red and went really fast.

She drove fast all the way to Shane’s place.

When we got there and I hurried to the door, I knocked, rang the doorbell, and punched at the door.

It was locked.

Chances were, he wasn’t home.

I looked at Abby.

“Do you love him?” Abby asked.

“I actually do. I feel so dumb. I fell in love with him. We were just fooling around and…”

“Let me