“I love her. I thought I did before, but it was just an infatuation. This is different.”
I leaned against the truck and shaded my eyes from the afternoon sun. “How?”
“I used to think she was this perfect person. That everything she did was right. Now I know that she’s got flaws, but I love those flaws. She’s not perfect and I love her the way she is. She makes me want to be a better person, and she doesn’t care about everything in my past. How could I not fall for that?”
Jesus, it was so simple for him.
I’d never told a girl I loved her. Probably because I’d never loved one. At least not in the way Zan was talking. His past was dark, yes, but it was a temporary darkness. He hadn’t been born to it, hadn’t been raised in it. His parents were generally decent, and his brother, however fucked up he was, loved him too. He’d had money and second chances and people who’d pulled him through the dark.
I shoved my past aside and went to help him with some of his fingering.
Katie had been ignoring me and I’d been letting her, out of respect. She probably never wanted to see me again, and I was fine with that. Not that I wouldn’t have picked up the phone if she’d called me. I would have. The sex was great and I would be more than happy to let it happen again, if she wanted it to. I just wasn’t into forcing girls like some guys.
I was about to answer Zan when my phone rang from my back pocket. I looked at the screen and it was an unknown number. It could have been someone calling my phone with a wrong number, but I didn’t think so.
“Hello?” My greeting was met with silence and I was about to hang up when she spoke.
“Hey,” Katie said after a long pause. “You said if I needed anything to call. I need a distraction. Of the physical variety.”
“Mhm,” I said, fully aware that Zan was sitting right in front of me and Katie would not want him knowing. “When?”
“Right now. Can I come to your place?”
“I’m fixing a friend’s truck right now, but maybe in an hour?”
She sighed.
“Okay, fine. But don’t tell anyone.”
“You got it,” I said and hung up.
“Who was that?” Zan said.
“Just a friend who wanted to look at that extra guitar I’ve been trying to sell. He’s coming over in an hour.”
“Can you finish in time? I have to get this back to Lottie so Will doesn’t kill me.”
“Sure thing.” I got on my back and slid back under the truck, trying not to grin too much.
***
Zan left ten minutes before Katie’s Mazda pulled into the lot next to my apartment. She’d never been here, but she clearly knew where it was anyway.
She was visibly upset when I opened the door at the bottom of the stairs. I was on the second floor, but the first floor apartment was vacant, so I just treated the whole space as mine.
“You okay?” I said, taking in her puffy red eyes and the fact that she hadn’t made much of an effort with her appearance again.
She laughed without humor.
“I wish everyone would stop asking me that. I’m so tired of saying ‘I’m fine.’ I didn’t come here for that.”
Jesus, calm down. We signed up for a hookup, not a therapy session. “Okay. From now on I will not ask you if you’re okay. Deal?”
She inhaled.
“Deal.”
“Any other requests?”
She thought for a moment and stepped over the threshold until we were chest to chest.
“Yes. Don’t call me babe.”
“You got it,” I said before I picked her up and kissed her so hard our teeth collided. I nearly broke both our necks getting us up the stairs and through my front door, but somehow I managed it.
At least this time I got my pants all the way off. She was no less frantic as she stripped me down and shoved me toward the couch. I had to toss the banjo on the floor, hoping it didn’t get damaged. She straddled me and this time at least, I was prepared with a condom. She tore the package with her teeth and rolled it on, like someone who had had a lot of practice, before sliding down on me.
Neither of us spoke.
I let her take the lead this time, picking up her quick and vicious rhythm. My