“Hey, I just wanted to let you know what’s going on. Zack called Zan and he’s drunk and he’s in a park somewhere and Zan called the police so Zack is getting arrested. Again.” I stopped walking, causing a pileup on the sidewalk that got me nasty looks and more than a few curse words thrown at me.
“What?”
“Yeah, I debated about calling you, but I didn’t want you to be out of the loop. We’re going back to the dorm now. Where are you?” I heard Zan and Will talking in the background. Arguing, it sounded like.
“I just left anthro. I’ll be there in five,” I said, picking up my pace. That guy just didn’t know when to say when, the fucker. Maybe this time they’d put him in jail and he’d stay there, where he belonged. The Zack I knew, the one who pointed out the constellations and made me all knee-watery wasn’t real. I’d probably known that all along, but it took him punching me in the face for me to really see it, once and for all.
No wonder my parents thought I needed therapy.
Lottie hug-attacked me the second I opened the door to our room, nearly knocking the wind out of me.
“Are you okay? I know you’re probably not and that’s a stupid question to ask, but I have to ask because I care about you and I’m your friend.” I patted her back and she let me go.
“I’m fine,” I said in a voice that didn’t sound like mine. In reality, I didn’t really care. He could rot in jail for the rest of his natural life. I didn’t know why they’d involved me, honestly. I was trying to move on, and this wasn’t helping. I almost said something to Lottie, but she looked so concerned that I swallowed my bitter words.
She kept rubbing my shoulder and sat down with me on my bed. Will was furiously texting Audrey and Zan was staring at me with eyes that burned almost as intensely as Stryker’s. They were two of a kind. They saw what you tried to hide, but at least they kept their mouths shut about it. Most of the time.
“I think we need to go out,” Lottie announced, standing up. We all looked at her as if she’d lost her damn mind, me included. A second ago, she’d been whispering soothing things like I was going to have a mental breakdown or something.
“Now?” Will said, his fingers still flying. “You really think now is a good time?”
“Well, not right now. Tonight. If we all sit around here thinking about this we’re going to go crazy. Am I right?” Zan put his hand on her shoulder and kissed her cheek. How was it that he and Zack shared so much DNA, but they’d turned out two completely different people? The more I lived, the more I decided life didn’t make any sense.
“I think it’s a good idea. You in, Will?” Zan said, putting his arm around Lottie.
Will nodded, not looking up from his phone. “Just let me ask Aud.”
“And we can bring Simon. He’s been dying to show off his new boyfriend. And we can have Trish and Stryker.” Lottie looked at me when she said his name, and emphasized both syllables. Not this again.
He was the last person I wanted to see right now, but I shut my mouth and let them chatter away. Maybe it could be good. Going out in a group. Normal. I could be normal. Or at least pretend. Just because we were going out in a group and there would be talking, didn’t mean our relationship would change from our current “just sex” arrangement. No, we would put on a show for our friends and then go back to the way it had been.
“Sounds great,” I said with a smile that felt almost real. I waited until after Lottie told me was coming and then escaped to the bathroom to call him.
“Hey. I’m not calling you for sex. I just want to set some ground rules for this group thing,” I said before he could get a word in.
“Hello to you, too. If you’re going to ask me to be a douchebag in front of my friends, the answer is no.”
I took a breath, hoping he didn’t take it the wrong way. “I wasn’t going to ask that, actually. I was going to ask if we could put that on hold for