as the ‘nunnery’. He said he’d had no idea there were children living in the house. He’d had no idea there was a man.
I was very lonely by now. I tried to rekindle my friendship (or what semblance there had ever been of a friendship) with Phin, but he was still so angry with me for betraying him the night he pushed me into the river. And yes, I know I should have been angry with him for pushing me into the river in the first place, but we’d taken drugs, and I was annoying, I could see that I was annoying, and in a way I’d deserved to be pushed into the river and my fury afterwards was more to do with hurt pride and feelings than any sense that he’d put me in mortal danger. And also, I was in love with him and when you’re in love, you’ll forgive almost anything. It’s a trait that I’ve carried with me into adult life, unfortunately. I always fall in love with people who hate me.
I came upon Clemency in the kitchen one afternoon shortly after the announcement of my sister’s pregnancy.
‘Did you know?’ I said.
She flushed a little as obviously we’d barely spoken over the years and now we were talking about her best friend having sex with her father.
She said, ‘No. I had no idea.’
‘But you’re so close. How could you not have known?’
She shrugged. ‘I just thought they were exercising.’
‘What do you think about it?’
‘I think it’s disgusting.’
I nodded, vehemently, as if to say we are on the same page, good.
‘Has your father ever done anything like this before?’
‘You mean …?’
‘The babies. Has he ever got people pregnant before?’
‘Oh,’ she said softly. ‘No. Only my mum.’
I told her to come to my room and she looked scared for a minute, which hurt my feelings, but then I thought it was good. It was good to be scary if I was going to overthrow David and get us all out of this house.
In my room I pulled my mattress away from the wall and pulled out the objects I’d found in David and Birdie’s room. I spread them across the floor and let her look at them. I told her where I’d found them.
‘But how did you get in there?’ she asked.
‘I can’t tell you,’ I said.
I saw confusion sluice through her as she looked at the objects. ‘Your pencil case?’
‘Yes. My pencil case. And there was so much other stuff.’ I told her about the silky underwear and the whiskey and the piles of cash. And as I told her I saw that I was breaking her. It was like the day I’d told Phin about seeing his dad kissing Birdie. I’d forgotten that I was talking to a child about her father, that there was a deep seam of shared genetic material, memories, connection there and that I was ripping it all apart with my words.
‘He’s been lying to us all along!’ she said, rubbing her eyes with the heels of her hands. ‘I thought we were doing all of this for the poor people! I don’t understand. I don’t understand!’
I looked her firmly in the eye. ‘It’s simple,’ I said. ‘Your father’s taken everything of value from my parents and now he wants their house. Legally this house is held in trust for me and my sister until we’re twenty-five. But look.’ I showed her the will I’d pulled out of the box. It had a codicil added in David’s handwriting. The house, he’d stated in cod legal language, was in the event of the deaths of my parents now to pass directly to David Sebastian Thomsen and his descendants. This codicil had been witnessed and countersigned by my mother and Birdie. It wouldn’t stand a chance in hell of making it through a court of law but its intent was clear.
‘And he’s having a baby to secure his stake in the house.’
Clemency didn’t say anything for a while. Then she said, ‘What are we going to do?’
‘I don’t know yet,’ I said, rubbing my chin as though there might be a wise man’s beard there, but of course there was nothing of the sort. I didn’t grow a beard until I was in my twenties and even then it was pretty unimpressive. ‘But we are going to do something.’
She looked at me, wide-eyed. ‘OK.’
‘But’, I said firmly, ‘you have to promise me that this is our secret.’ I gestured at the objects I’d purloined