a long time. And by then, we had Paige and Amberlynn, and it was almost like I had to be the parent. She checked out.” Lottie would kill me for sharing so much with anyone, especially a Tucker. But there was something so understanding in Michael’s gaze, I didn’t think he’d judge us.
“That must have been hard,” Michael said quietly. “How old were you?”
“I was ten.” I took a sip of my beer, remembering how I’d felt all those years ago, like if I slipped up or screwed up, there was a chance Mom would just leave. She was already so distant in her sadness, sometimes I wondered if she even knew how much I’d been doing to try to help.
“How long was your mom depressed?”
I sighed. It had taken me so many years to realize that Mom had been depressed. “A long time,” I said. “As a kid though, I didn’t understand that’s what it was.”
“Of course not.”
“I just thought that maybe without Dad around, Mom wasn’t interested in being a parent anymore.” A shadow of the fear and sadness I had felt as a little girl awoke inside me and I tried to press it down. I had purposely put those feelings away. It was odd that I was talking to Michael about something I’d never even mentioned to Luke.
“Well, it wasn’t what she signed up for, right? Raising three girls alone?”
“It wasn’t what any of us signed up for.” A wave of sadness threatened to wash through me, and I ignored it, pasted on a smile.
“And so what about you?” He asked.
I shook my head in confusion. “What?”
“You. You became this super successful career woman. So, no kids for you?”
“You might have missed the part of my super successful career where I had something close to a breakdown and ended up sitting in a shack eating clams out of a bucket.”
Michael’s face changed then, and I thought I might have offended him. I rushed to apologize.
“I mean, tonight is fun, this isn’t what I meant. It’s just—”
“Addie, I get it.” He smiled, waving away my apology. “If I’ve learned anything about life, and honestly, I don’t think I have learned much—no one’s coming to me for tips, at least—but it’s this: nothing ever goes the way you want.”
“Wow. Cynical much?”
“Yeah. Well, I guess I learned pretty early that making plans is pointless. Or maybe I just suck at execution.”
I frowned at him, surprise making the wheels in my head turn as I tried to figure out what he meant. “You own a huge farm supply store. You’re your own boss. You have a wonderful son. What plans did you have that went so wrong?”
He sat back in his chair and his face completely changed. He reached out, lifted his glass, and downed the remaining whiskey. “Nothing.”
I sensed that we were finished. I felt a little cheated—I’d told him so much, and when it was his turn, he clammed up.
“Should we head back and see if burning a bunch of crap made the spirits decide it smelled too bad to stay in the house?” He asked.
“Funny,” I said, though I did feel a little silly about my knee-jerk decision to try to cleanse the house today.
“I don’t blame you,” he said, his tone softening. “That noise is terrifying. Especially if you’re there alone.”
“And there’s something else,” I said, deciding to just tell him. He had to live in the house too.
He cocked his head as he signaled for the check, still listening intently.
“When I was reading those letters, I had this feeling,” I said, dropping his gaze because it was just too embarrassing to hold. “Like someone was right there with me, reading over my shoulder. And in a way, I felt like maybe they were mad, like I was invading their privacy or something. That was when the scream came.”
He nodded, moving to sign the check. I reached for my purse. “You get the next one,” he said, dismissing my gesture. “And I don’t blame you at all, Addie. The house is a little spooky. But we’ll fix that. We’ll make it the most amazing house in Singletree, okay?”
I lifted a shoulder. The house, this project—it was more of a means to an end than anything else. If it ended up looking amazing, it would be good for resale value, but didn’t make a difference to me otherwise. “Sure.”
“I’ve got the roofers coming out tomorrow like we talked about.”