He gazes at me a moment. "Yeah, I guess you're right."
"Homemade rolls," the waiter says, setting them in front of us. "Enjoy."
I grab a roll as he leaves. "I've missed these. Go ahead and grab one before I eat them all."
"Hungry?" he says with a smile.
"Starving. That hike really gave me an appetite."
The conversation never returns to Celine or his relationship or what he's looking for in a girl. Instead we talk about work and our families and other safe topics.
As Aiden's paying the check, my phone dings with a text from Tanner. Can I take you to dinner tomorrow? New Thai place just opened by my apartment.
"Let me guess," Aiden says as he signs the receipt. "Your boyfriend?"
"I'm not sure I'd call him that, but yes, it's Tanner."
"Go ahead and text him back."
"I'll do it when I get back to my room."
"I was going to suggest we go downtown and check out the lights, like last time."
I'd love to stroll down Main Street with Aiden and look at the lights but I don't feel like I should. Even though he hasn't come out and said he wants to date me, things are feeling more intimate between us after spending all this time together. The hike. Lingering at the bar over drinks. The candlelit dinner. It's felt like a date even though we're acting like we're just friends. Going on a romantic stroll with him might be enough to tempt us into doing something we shouldn't. Even on the walk today, I almost held his hand. I wasn't thinking. It just felt like the natural thing to do, until I woke up and realized he's not mine.
When he breaks up with Celine and I end things with Tanner, things will be different. I can finally tell Aiden how I feel and not have this guilt hanging over me. We'll be free to do what we want.
"I think I'll just head to my room," I say. "It's been a long day and I want to get a good night's rest before having to drive back tomorrow."
"What time are you leaving?"
"Probably around nine."
"You sure you don't want to stick around? We could go on another hike."
It's another thing I'd love to do, but not now. Not yet. We both need to be single before we see each other again.
"I need to get back to New York. We have an event tomorrow night. Oh, I need to tell Tanner that. He wanted to go to dinner tomorrow." I get my phone out and text him.
"How are you guys doing?" Aiden asks. "Things going well?"
"They're going okay." I set my phone down. "We haven't been out much. He likes going out on weekends and I always have to work."
"He'll adjust. He's good about being flexible. It's one of the things I like about him."
"He's a really great guy. Always checks in with me during the day. Calls every night."
"He really likes you, in case you haven't figured that out."
"I have." I force out a smile, wishing I felt more for Tanner.
"He talks about you all the time. He's never been that way with anyone else. He's had serious girlfriends, but with you it's different. It's like he—"
"I'm ending it," I blurt out.
"You're what?"
"I'm ending things with Tanner," I say with a sigh. "I like him and think he's a nice guy. I just don't feel a spark with him. I think we'd be good as friends but I can't see him as anything more."
"Then why are you still dating him?"
"I thought I needed to give it more time. Sometimes you need to get to know someone before you feel anything. But it's been two weeks and still...nothing."
"When are you going to tell him?"
"Hopefully next time I see him. I don't want to tell him over the phone."
"I'm surprised." Aiden leans back. "I thought you guys were good. Tanner makes it sound like you and him are doing great. He's going to be crushed to find this out."
I cringe. "I know. I feel really bad, but I can't keep dating him if it's not going to work."
"You really felt nothing for him?"
"I think he's attractive, and if things were different, maybe it would've worked between us."
"Different how?"
I choose not to answer, because the answer is him. If I'd never met Aiden, I wouldn't have known I could feel this way about a guy. When I didn't feel the same way about Tanner, I lost interest.