Exposed Exposed (Dom Nation #1) - E. Davies Page 0,35
having his way.
But he said nothing and put his cup in the sink, then leaned on the kitchen island like he was trying to keep a physical wall between us, too. Still, there was something in the way he watched me…
“Come on,” I breathed out, leaning forward to put my cup on the coffee table. I rose to my feet, slow and tentative. “I know my own mind. I’m not the mess I was yesterday. I’m me again.”
“I didn’t like seeing you like that,” Rex said softly, leaning further into the counter, pressing his thumbs into the edge of it like he wanted to crack off the whole countertop. “I might not know you, but I know Isaac’s effects.”
Fuck. Here he was, still getting between me and anything good I might want for myself in my life.
I drew a breath to try to wash away the fury that built in my chest at his name, then let it out. “How long have you known him?”
Rex squinted, his gaze flicking beyond me to the full-length windows over the city. “Four years? Since I started going to DN.”
My chest was suddenly tight as I got the confirmation I’d wanted. I wasn’t sure I wanted it anymore.
Four? That meant he had lied about never going on the scene. So I had to assume he’d been lying about everything else, too. Like me being the only one. I’d just been another hole in his schedule, until I was inconvenient.
I wandered closer, pressing my forearms on the counter as I took a deep breath. The punch in my gut was slow to fade.
“Was he important to you?” Rex asked, drawing my gaze to him. He didn’t look unsympathetic. His voice was soft, like he was gentling a scared animal.
I nodded.
“And he hurt you?”
I hesitated. I was afraid of what I was going to unleash if I was truthful, but I was tired of keeping his dirty secrets when it turned out I was his dirty secret.
“Yes,” I whispered.
Rex’s fists went tight on the countertop. He shifted his weight, nostrils flaring and eyes flashing. But instead of being afraid at the anger rolling in a steady wave from him, I was drawn to Rex’s outrage on my behalf.
“Then… fuck him,” Rex said, his voice thin. “Well, for absolute clarity: don’t fuck him. Fuck anyone but him. Get him out of your system. He never deserved you.”
There was no chance like the present.
“I want to,” I told him, pausing just long enough to catch his gaze. Once he looked at me, I didn’t let him look away, my gaze flickering between his eyes. “I want you,” I clarified.
My hands trembled as I came out and said it. I was risking rejection—directly—for him. Again.
But hell, I wasn’t a teen anymore. There was no point in dancing around it. But before Rex could answer, my mouth took over from my brain.
“But you’re blowing hot and cold,” I told Rex. “I’m here in your house, in your bed, and yet you won’t flirt with me for more than ten seconds. You hold hands with me, give me a ride home, let me kneel for you. But you won’t let me please you. I don’t even need to come. I can just service you. It would make me…” I trailed off, shaking my head.
I couldn’t explain how complete I would feel with his cock buried in the back of my throat. The way my dick jumped in my pajamas at the barest excuse. Hell, just begging—because this was begging, no mistaking it—made me flush with a guilty pleasure.
“Slate—” Rex’s voice was strangled.
“If you’re trying to torture me,” I laughed, my voice warbling as I shook my head, “it’s working, Rex.”
Rex’s eyes steadily widened. His stunned expression looked beautiful, lips slightly parted. A pink flush crossed his cheeks. I wanted to kiss the surprise off him, but I didn’t even dare lean any further over the counter.
Then his brow furrowed, and he bit his lip hard. He looked so torn that for a moment, I almost felt bad for him. He shook his head slowly.
Fuck. Don’t turn me down now.
Even as the weight of his rejection crushed me, I’d get a little thrill out of it, and that was not a part of myself I was prepared to accept. Much less think about, even for a moment.
So I let my snark out, distracting myself. “Let me guess,” I said tartly. “It’s not me, it’s you.”