Escaping Parker - F.T. Zele Page 0,61

didn’t think I would ever feel like this, but you have shown me a side to myself I didn’t think could ever exist again.”

These words, ones I have been longing to hear, I never thought I would ever have those directed at me again in my life. They affect me down to the core, and I’m trying not to let my eyes tear up. I’m not a horrible person, and I am capable of choosing good things for my life. Every decision I make won’t always end up being wrong.

I swipe at my moist eyes, afraid to let him see the emotions and kill this moment. He reaches around me and turns off the water, taking the dish and sponge out of my hands and making me face him.

“Why does that make you sad?” he asks.

“I’m not sad, I’m happy. Being here with you, this new life, it’s overwhelming at times. But you always know just the right words to say. I don’t know if I say this enough, but thank you.”

“You don’t need to thank me, you know this. That smile is all I need. I do have some good news, though.”

“Yeah, what kind of good news?”

“Well, that guy in the picture you told me about? Complete coincidence. Before I came in here, I got an email about him. He moved out here, still does real estate, and Melissa is married to him. They have been out here for three years now. It’s safe to say that you are perfectly fine. There’s nothing tying back to California. This is your life, and I’m very confident that you will be happy here.” He squeezes my hands supportively.

“That’s great news! Thank you for looking into that. I guess I’m always going to be skeptical, and thinking the worst,” I explain.

“No, it’s called being vigilant. You’re paying attention to your surroundings, and keeping your eyes on everything. It’s not a bad thing. You know when something seems off, so that’s a good thing. It means you aren’t careless.”

Through all this happiness and revelations, there are still two things that irk me: I want to be divorced and have that chapter completely closed in my life, which I know won’t happen. And I want to escape Parker, and be Clarissa again, Clarissa before Steven. I want to be able to be to fully be free, and I’m scared if these things aren’t ever rectified, I will never come full circle.

I walk around him to check the chicken on the stove.

“Can I help you?” Rig asks, still standing there.

“Yes, can you set the table, and I’ll bring the food out in just a moment. It’s almost done. Oh, can you grab the wine in the fridge?”

“Sure. I’ll meet you out there.”

When I finally get out with the food, we sit down, Rig pours the wine, and we’re ready to eat.

“It looks really good. I can’t believe I’ve been cooking this whole time and you’ve been hiding your cooking skills.”

“I wouldn’t speak before you have even taken a bite,” I joke, knowing it’s good.

“Funny.” He takes a bite and pretends to cough like it’s the grossest thing ever. “I’m kidding, it’s good.”

“Funny guy you are tonight.” I sip my wine.

While Rig clears the kitchen, I take the blanket off the back of the couch, wrap it around me, and finish my wine. I wait for Rig to hang out a bit before I head off to bed.

Starting to doze off on the couch, I try and keep my eyes open as long as I can, but it’s not working. Rig comes in, sits next to me, and sees how tired I am.

“Come on, let’s get you into bed. You look exhausted,” he says, grabbing me off the couch and carrying me to bed.

Once he gets me all tucked in, he climbs in beside me, holding me tight like I might get away.

It’s the day before Thanksgiving and Rig and I are cooking a small, first holiday meal in this house. I’m thankful for so many things this year, so spending this holiday with one of the people I’m most thankful for seems close to perfect to me. Prepping everything for tomorrow is on our agenda since I have today and the rest of the week off. Working side by side in the kitchen, we sort through bags of food.

“Hey, what’s this for?” Rig asks, holding up a can.

“Oh, that’s mine. I wanted to make something that I made back at home with my family. You