The Enforcer - Kelli Callahan Page 0,32

of women, I think― that air of danger about the men.”

“Yes,” I agree with a nod. “There is that, but attractiveness aside, it pisses me off more than anything today.”

“So why don’t you tell him how you feel?” she asks, sighing heavily.

I throw myself down into a lobby chair, and she walks over, bringing me a water bottle. “Tell him how I feel?” I ask. “What the hell am I going to say? What’s there to tell?”

“Well, you obviously have feelings for him.”

“What?” I gasp, looking at her like she’s crazy.

“You must have feelings for him. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be reacting this way. If you didn’t care, wouldn’t you just ignore him altogether?”

“Well…” I say, trailing off.

“But you do care, because you stayed, and you listened to him, even though it went against your better judgment?”

“I mean―” I say, as she continues on.

“And if you do have feelings for him, which you do, why don’t you just come out and say it? Why dance around the whole thing? Call it what it is and lay all the cards out on the table.”

“Because,” I say “he wouldn’t be interested in a woman like me.”

“Why not?” she asks, a thin line creasing between her slender brows.

“Because I’m not the kind of girl you meet at a biker bar.”

“Oh?” she asks with a frown.

“I’m not exciting or daring. I don’t just do things for the sake of doing them. I’ve spent most of my adult life around politicians,” I laugh, shaking my head. “I’m not the kind of person who was cut out to be with a man like him. I wouldn’t even know how to attract a man like him,” I sigh, throwing my hands into the air, then leaning my head back.

“I think you’ve attracted him just fine,” she whispers.

I turn to face her. “What do you mean?”

“Well, it’s just that... I saw the way he looks at you.”

“How does he look at me?”

“Oh, you know, the way men do when they want something they tell themselves they don’t actually want. Like drinking from the spring of forbidden desires,” she says.

“So getting closer to me is like drinking from the spring of forbidden desires?”

“Yes. That’s exactly what it is. They are dying of thirst, but they’re afraid to take a drink, so you have to be the one that goes against that.”

“Why?” I asked.

“Chivalry. They won’t make the move; they’ll continually push thoughts of it aside, saying that they don’t deserve you, they don’t have a chance, or that you’re better off entirely without them.”

“How do you know this?” I ask, mouth open in surprise.

“I read romances,” she shrugs. “And that’s the way it goes. It all comes down to tropes. Once you have them memorized, well, it’s not hard to know what comes next.”

“That sounds like it might get a little boring,” I whisper.

“Oh, not at all because each story is still unique, and just because you know something doesn’t mean it’s not fun anymore. You know how to have sex, but that doesn’t mean that you no longer enjoy it.”

I frown down at the ground.

“You do enjoy it, don’t you?” she asks softly, and I stare at her, mouth open.

“That’s a really personal question, Becki.”

“It is, but you didn’t deny it or agree, which tells me you have some issues of your own. God, just like a romance,” she says cheerfully, getting closer to me. “So now that you know, what are you going to do? Are you gonna go after him? Make him see reason? Make him touch you and love you?”

“Love?” I laugh. “We are not in a place for love.”

“People rarely are,” she nods with a smile, “it doesn’t mean they don’t feel it.”

“How old are you, Becki?” I ask.

“Twenty-four,” she chirps brightly.

“Well, I definitely think you’re wise beyond your years. Thank you.”

She smiles. “I try.”

Walking back and forth inside my room I eagerly await Jake’s arrival. Becky made some interesting points. I do have some feelings for Jake and an undeniable attraction for him too. It’s something that I’ve tried to push aside, particularly with everything going on between us right now, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t go after something that I want just because it’s the wrong time. It’s never the right time. I’m not talking about love― I’m talking about something lesser that could eventually if nurtured, become love. For right now, though, it was definitely sexual. If I want a man, why can’t I just go out there, grab him,