The Rogue Queen(40)

“How . . . how did you do that?” I ask.

“Years of practice.” Healer Mego unrolls his sleeves, his gaze resisting mine. “I’m sorry, Kindred. The Voider’s toxins are beyond healing. Only he can remove his poison from you.”

“What?” My hope to extract the cold-fire within me wastes away. “But what if he doesn’t?”

“Then I’m afraid his toxic cold will smother your soul-fire until it’s gone.”

“I’ll die?” No mortal can live without soul-fire. It is our essence.

“Your mortal half is already dying.” At my expression of horror, he adds, “You can try Razing, but I do not recommend you do so. The poisons would be quelled for a short while, but they would return twofold.”

My belly flips and dives. I have razed once before. An Aquifier cut me several times to bleed out a poison that hid my abilities. I will not relive that excruciating ritual for a temporary reprieve. “Can you do anything?” I plead.

“No,” he replies, his tone gentle. “I’m sorry.”

I sink onto the chair, knocking my pack to the floor. The temptation to lie down and let the cold consume me nearly pushes me to tears. The healer repacks his basket. Why did he even come if he cannot help me? I want to tell him to go away, but I withhold my bitterness. Lashing out at him would be wrong, and I cannot abide the thought of Udug winning in any small way. He will not compel me to cry or give into my endless shivers. He would have me believe I cannot survive. But we have the Lestarian Navy on our side, and soon the rebels will stand with us. Both are mercies from the gods.

I harvest a kernel of courage and push out my voice. “How long do I have until . . . ?”

“The full effect of the poisons takes a moon to manifest.”

“Udug poisoned me a fortnight ago.” I have about that much time left to find a remedy the healer is unaware of or persuade Udug to cure me. Any chance is better than the healer’s predicted outcome. “Are you certain no one can ward off the Voider’s powers?” I ask, thinking of Ashwin. “What if someone’s soul-fire can lessen the cold within me?”

“I would caution against relying on another’s soul-fire to supplement your own. Such practices are unpredictable and will worsen your side effects.” My fear returns, as does his kindly voice. “If you stay in Lestari, I will make your final hours comfortable.”

I scoop up my bag. “I must go.”

“Kindred, I pray you’ll reconsider. The damage the Voider’s powers are wreaking—”

“Is less than what he plans to do the world.” I pause at the door. “Thank you. I trust you’ll keep this between us.” I wait for the healer to grasp my expectation and then go.

Ashwin rushes down the corridor, dressed in his travel clothes. “There you are. We’re ready to depart.” He slows to a halt, his eyes growing. “What are you wearing?”

“Trousers. Mathura said they flatter me.”

His color reddens. “I—she—” He fumbles for words that do not come.