Now I was boiling mad. I felt like dumping my shake on her head right in front of the whole town. Anger welled up in my boots all the way through my torn tights and raged up my spine.
"Eternity is forever, but marriage? That's even longer," she said with that cute girlie giggle. "What if I told you that Alexander planned to turn me? On my twenty-first birthday. In the cemetery, in front of the whole town!"
"Then I'd tell you I think you're making it up." I fumed inside. "Besides, we can ask Alexander all about that turning at twenty-one when we get back."
I was horrified at the thought of returning to the factory and Luna asking Alexander about something we hadn't really discussed and I had just now made up.
"And I'll ask Sebastian about your wedding, too," I shot back. Luna froze, frostier than her pink shake. It was then I knew I'd caught her, too. "Well, for now, we'll just consider our discussion a secret between friends."
The waiter placed two large bags of food and a carton filled with shakes on the counter. Luna grabbed a handful of napkins and her shake and headed out the door and left me to struggle with the rest. When we arrived back at the mill, I bolted out the car door, leaving Luna to carry the load. Only it backfired. No one was glad to see me. The vampires were hungry and she got the credit for the bounty. Each ravenous vampire took his or her meal and tore into the food while I picked at mine, having eaten three times that day already.
It was very obvious that Sebastian was head-over-Doc Martens for Luna. He doted on her so much it made my stomach turn. I knew he was mesmerized by her, as she did have a hypnotic glow around her. However, if Alexander wasn't interested in her, then I wondered why I was so jealous of her.
Scarlet also seemed preoccupied. I sensed a loneliness emanating from her. We all were coupled up. There were obviously three couples here - Luna and Sebastian, Alexander and me, Jagger and Onyx - and each couple was in a stage of romance, whether one had been bitten or not. And there was one single vampire girl. Scarlet, however, longed for a mortal just as I did for a vampire. She was pining for Trevor, a conservative mortal who was a player on and off the field. I knew Trevor wasn't good for her, for so many reasons. And at the end of the day, if he was going to be with his antithesis girl, someone goth, it probably would have been me.
The advantage I had was the sunlight. Something Scarlet, oddly enough, longed for, and I detested.
Instead of giving me a good-night kiss at my front door, Alexander came inside. I think we both needed some private time together since all our nights were being consumed with the Crypt and being on the watch for the possible Covenant. Alexander didn't hang out in my bedroom a lot. I preferred the Mansion, with its magnificent space and style, and it was also minus two doting parents and one pesky little brother.
But having Alexander in my room felt amazing. My little space didn't seem so morbid after all. Alexander brought life to it. And having him there was exhilarating. The way he walked around, examining and touching everything on display, was like he was touching me. I watched him look closely at my knickknacks, books, and music as if he was trying to get to know me or see into my soul. I felt safe with him here. Nothing could bother me - not physically or emotionally. And as tough as I was, it was nice for a moment to let my guard down and feel safe because of someone else for a change.
Alexander sat on my bed, like a gentleman would, if it were acceptable for a gentleman to sit on a lady's bed. But I pulled him over and made him lie beside me. I imagined what it would be like if he could cuddle with me as I fell asleep here, just as I did with him in his coffin. But that wasn't going to happen anytime soon, especially when we'd often get interrupted by Billy Boy, looking for attention.
"Wow - I don't know how you sleep like this. I worry about you all the time," he said tenderly. "What do you mean?" "Open - exposed. Anyone - or anything - could come into your room. You aren't hidden from danger." "What would come into my room?"
"I don't even want to think about it. I'm miles away from you and . . . it's just not safe. Not from the sun, I mean. But from people. There are so many things that can happen if you're not secured." "We have a security system." I caressed his hair playfully, but Alexander was serious. "I know. But don't you feel strange looking up and knowing anyone could watch you sleeping? Especially since you can't see in the dark."
I thought about it for a moment. I'd contemplated many things from the vampire's viewpoint, but this was something I hadn't.
"I didn't mean to scare you. It's one of the reasons I want to . . ." "Yes?" "It is one of the reasons I'd want you to be a vampire." I sat up. "Really?" "It just seemed odd to me that mortals would prefer to sleep that way." "That's not what I meant." I leaned into him eagerly. "I just feel funny - you here, not totally secured. But I guess it works for your kind. It always has." "Yes, but back to what you were saying." I hoped he'd go back to talking about me becoming a vampire. "I want you to be safe, that's all," he said, squeezing my hand.
From Alexander's perspective, we mortals lived open, vulnerable lives. He was hidden away from the sun and predators. Even if someone were to find the coffin, he was locked inside.
"It's weird. You can see all these things and hear all these noises. No wonder you have insomnia." "I have insomnia because you aren't here with me. So . . . if you really want me to be safe, maybe it's time." "I'd just feel safer if you'd start sleeping in a coffin." Just then my door creaked open. Billy's expression turned to surprise. "Get out!" I said, hopping off the bed. "Uh . . . we are making up lyrics to a song." But that didn't keep Billy out. Instead he was totally interested. "You're writing a song? That's so cool. I want to hear it." "It goes, 'Safer in a coffin, and if your brother doesn't leave, he'll be in one, too.'" Billy just frowned. "It's okay, man," Alexander said. "What's up?" "What are you doing in my room?" I snarled at Billy. "I'm one step away from bringing back Nerd Boy."
My brother wasn't bothered by my threat. He was under the Alexander spell. Like a kid in the company of a professional athlete, Billy was enamored byAlexander's presence. Alexander was the big brother Billy never had. And in kind, Alexander was always attentive to my brother, as kind and focused on him as he could be.
"Isn't it past your bedtime?" I finally asked. I could see Alexander had a longing for my younger sibling, as if he was missing one himself. He seemed delighted by the attention.
I let the two talk for a few more minutes before I led, or rather pushed, my little brother out of my room. Alexander and I had enough distractions to deal with and I wanted my precious alone time with him. I thought now would be a good time to bring up what I'd learned from my conversation with Luna at Hatsy's Diner. I sat on the bed withAlexander and entwined my fingers with his. "Sebastian really likes Luna," I said.
"Yes, I can see that." "No. I mean they've talked future and everything." "Yeah . . . ?" "I think they are going to get married." Alexander laughed. "Sebastian? I don't think so." "Luna seems to think so. And the way he drools all over her, I wouldn't be surprised. . . ." "You don't know Sebastian that well then." Alexander continued to laugh. "Well, maybe he found the right one," I said. "For today." "I think this is different," I tried to tell him. "How?" "Because he bit her." I looked him straight in the eyes. But Alexander wasn't impressed. "But didn't he say the same thing about Becky? That she was different?" Alexander asked. "I guess . . ."
"Do you know how many times I've heard him say that?" Alexander said with a grin. "That's what vampires do, they bite."
"But you don't." "Not yet . . ." He lifted my hair from my neck and nibbled it, sending me into giggles.
Then he took my hand. "Sebastian's only heard me say I was in love once. About a girl I met when I came to this town."
My heart melted. Alexander was truly dreamy. His soulful eyes stared into mine and I kissed him with all my love. When we finished our embrace, I thought again about our conversation. "But with Luna - Sebastian seems to be sure this time," I said. "And he's acting on it - though impulsively," I lamented. "Raven, I don't live my life based on what everyone else is doing. I never have. And I thought you didn't either. That's one of the reasons I'm so attracted to you."
He was right. Why did I have to live my life differently - or expect things for Alexander and me because of anyone else? I'd been living according to my rules since I was born. And now, because Luna came to town, I was going to adjust my whole existence to keep up with hers? And worse, I was trying to do the same for Alexander.
But I couldn't get past her. She struck me to the core. It wasn't rational but emotional. "It's normal to be jealous sometimes," Alexander said. "But what are you jealous of, really? A guy who meets a girl and, without a thought, bites her at a party? What if Sebastian goes to another party? How will she feel then?"
I guess I was jealous that Luna was a vampire and I was still a mortal. That she was bitten and I wasn't. And that she thought she was getting married . . . and I still wasn't sure. But was I brave enough to say all those things to Alexander? To confront him out of fear and not out of love? And because of one impulsive person and another shifty one, to make him prove things to me he might not be ready to prove?
Alexander pulled me to him and took my face into his hands. "I hope that biting you isn't the only way I can convince you of my love for you. It's not that I don't want to. And it's not that I don't think about it every day. I've loved you from the first moment I saw you."