Eclipse Page 0,100

obstruction. "I can't - I mean I don't . . . I have to go."

I turned, but he grabbed my shoulders and spun me around.

"No, wait. I know that, Bella. But, look, answer me this, all right? Do you want me to go away and never see you again? Be honest."

It was hard to concentrate on his question, so it took a minute to answer. "No, I don't want that," I finally admitted.

Jacob grinned again. "See."

"But I don't want you around for the same reason that you want me around," I objected.

"Tell me exactly why you want me around, then."

I thought carefully. "I miss you when you're not there. When you're happy," I qualified carefully, "it makes me happy. But I could say the same thing about Charlie, Jacob. You're family. I love you, but I'm not in love with you."

He nodded, unruffled. "But you do want me around."

"Yes." I sighed. He was impossible to discourage.

"Then I'll stick around."

"You're a glutton for punishment," I grumbled.

"Yep." He stroked the tips of his fingers across my right cheek. I slapped his hand away.

"Do you think you could behave yourself a little better, at least?" I asked, irritated.

"No, I don't. You decide, Bella. You can have me the way I am - bad behavior included - or not at all."

I stared at him, frustrated. "That's mean."

"So are you."

That pulled me up short, and I took an involuntary step back. He was right. If I wasn't mean - and greedy, too - I would tell him I didn't want to be friends and walk away. It was wrong to try to keep my friend when that would hurt him. I didn't know what I was doing here, but I was suddenly sure that it wasn't good.

"You're right," I whispered.

He laughed. "I forgive you. Just try not to get too mad at me. Because I recently decided that I'm not giving up. There really is something irresistible about a lost cause."

"Jacob." I stared into his dark eyes, trying to make him take me seriously. "I love him, Jacob. He's my whole life."

"You love me, too," he reminded me. He held up his hand when I started to protest. "Not the same way, I know. But he's not your whole life, either. Not anymore. Maybe he was once, but he left. And now he's just going to have to deal with the consequence of that choice - me."

I shook my head. "You're impossible."

Suddenly, he was serious. He took my chin in his hand, holding it firmly so that I couldn't look away from his intent gaze.

"Until your heart stops beating, Bella," he said. "I'll be here - fighting. Don't forget that you have options."

"I don't want options," I disagreed, trying to yank my chin free unsuccessfully. "And my heartbeats are numbered, Jacob. The time is almost gone."

His eyes narrowed. "All the more reason to fight - fight harder now, while I can," he whispered.

He still had my chin - his fingers holding too tight, till it hurt - and I saw the resolve form abruptly in his eyes.

"N -" I started to object, but it was too late.

His lips crushed mine, stopping my protest. He kissed me angrily, roughly, his other hand gripping tight around the back of my neck, making escape impossible. I shoved against his chest with all my strength, but he didn't even seem to notice. His mouth was soft, despite the anger, his lips molding to mine in a warm, unfamiliar way.

I grabbed at his face, trying to push it away, failing again. He seemed to notice this time, though, and it aggravated him. His lips forced mine open, and I could feel his hot breath in my mouth.

Acting on instinct, I let my hands drop to my side, and shut down. I opened my eyes and didn't fight, didn't feel . . . just waited for him to stop.

It worked. The anger seemed to evaporate, and he pulled back to look at me. He pressed his lips softly to mine again, once, twice . . . a third time. I pretended I was a statue and waited.

Finally, he let go of my face and leaned away.

"Are you done now?" I asked in an expressionless voice.

"Yes," he sighed. He started to smile, closing his eyes.

I pulled my arm back and then let it snap forward, punching him in the mouth with as much power as I could force out of my body.

There was a crunching sound.

"Ow! OW!" I screamed, frantically hopping up