turning into. Dawn hadn’t stood a chance. I’d been wrong, but that didn’t mean I was happy about it.
Ryder took aim at the target several hundred meters down the range, stole a breath, and pinched the trigger back. The gun blast boomed. I closed my eyes and relived the shot that killed Dawn.
“I don’t need or want your forgiveness. I know I did the right thing. She was a level-red threat. I eliminated a Class A demon—did my fuckin’ job. So keep your goddamn forgiveness to yourself.”
Considering Jenna had said he was quiet, I figured I was getting the uncensored Ryder. I pinched my lips together, biting back a few choice words, before settling on, “I’m sorry about the whiskey.”
He aimed again and fired. “Was a waste of damn good whiskey.”
The words ‘you deserved it’ were on my lips, but I somehow managed to keep them to myself. Apparently, I did have some self-restraint left. “Ryder… Is everything okay? I mean, besides the obvious?”
“Everything’s peachy, Muse. Demons are spilling through the veil quicker than we can deport their asses back to hell. Hellhounds are roaming Boston. People are dying, and we don’t have the numbers to protect them. And you… you’re…” He lowered the gun to his side and glanced across at me.
I smiled as gently as I could. “I’m still me.”
For a moment, his eyes saddened, and he aged years in seconds. Beneath the haggard lines, a brutal honesty bled through his expression, and damn, he looked exhausted. Then it was gone, and I was staring at hard-as-nails Ryder as he glared back at me, daring me to ask him what I’d just seen. “For how long, Muse?”
Yeah, he had me there. Hours. Days. No more than that. If I got through the week without turning demon, it’d be a miracle. PC34 would buy me a few days, but once the antidote washed the drug from my veins, my time was up.
“You heard from Stefan?”
I stilled and bit my lip, suddenly finding the floor fascinating.
“That bad, huh?”
“He’s…”
“Forget it. I don’t wanna know. I’ve got enough shit to deal with. Just go, Muse. You got no business being here. We don’t need to work together any more. If anything, I should lock you up. I don’t wanna have to shoot a friend the way I did that little girl.”
“It won’t come to that.”
He didn’t look convinced. “Get outtah here, and don’t come sniffing around if Jenna asks again. My problems ain’t nothing you can fix.”
Tucking my hands into my pocket, I nodded. “I’m going to the Institute facility later, to see Akil, with P-C-Thirty-Four in my veins again. When I come out and I get my demon back… I’m... Well, if it comes to it, I’ll go back to the netherworld. If I’m going to go nuclear, I’ll do it there and take every fuckin’ demon with me. I’ll make you proud.” I favored him with my best Ryder wink, turned on my heel, and left with the weight of his gaze on me until I climbed the basement stairs.
CHAPTER TEN
A fter an hour’s journey in the back of a blacked-out van, I was escorted onto the grounds of the Institute’s secret facility, which resembled a country club until I got a look at the inside. A single-story compound capped a vast underground complex. The elevator taking me and my escort of armed guards below ground took an age to descend fifteen levels into the bowels of the facility.
Once we’d arrived, I was signed in, searched—again—and jabbed with a jet injector. Five minutes turned into what felt like an hour as I gritted my teeth and fought against the pain of having half of my thoughts and half my soul ripped out. At least I didn’t pass out this time. Striding beside my personal guard, I swallowed back bubbling panic. Without my demon, I felt naked and vulnerable. A chasm had opened up inside. It took all my effort to plaster an expression of indifference on my face. It was that or drop to my knees and sob. I did learn that PC34 had no effect on a soul-lock. He/it was still there, a clenching tightness in my chest, a stagnant pool of darkness at the back of my thoughts. If anything, without my demon, the doors were open… Come on in, Damien. Pull up a chair. Make yourself at home. While the resident demon is away, you can play. All I could do was hope my parasite couldn’t do