Do you take this rebel - By Sherryl Woods Page 0,67

They had made love. For a little while anger and hurt had slid away and their hearts had spoken. Cole had wanted this as desperately as she had. He just couldn’t make himself admit it.

Cassie might have pitied him for that, but right now she had no pity to spare. She was fighting not just for her son but for her marriage.

“If I stay,” she said firmly, her gaze clashing with his, “if I stay, then both of us have to work to make this marriage real. We have to do whatever it takes, see a counselor if we can’t figure things out on our own. The time has come for drastic measures, Cole. I’m willing.” She challenged him with a steady look. “Are you?”

He studied her warily. “Meaning?”

“No more separate bedrooms. No more separate beds.” She was adamant about it. There would be no compromise. “I love you. I always have. And I’m sorrier than I can say that I kept your son from you, but the truth is out now. You know. Either we deal with it and move on, together, as a family, or I take Jake and move back in with my mother and we go to court.”

Taking such a stance was a risk. She knew it even as the words left her mouth, but she had no choice. She would not live in emotional limbo. Maybe if Cole hadn’t mattered to her, she could have done it, but he did matter. He was the love of her life, the father of her son, and the distance between them was killing her bit by bit, day by day. It was worse than when they’d been separated, when she’d thought he had abandoned her.

He gave her a measured look, then said with a degree of bemusement, “You’ve changed.”

“I hope so. I’m not a teenage girl anymore.”

“No, I mean in the past few weeks. You’re stronger.”

Stronger? She wasn’t so sure about that. But she did recognize that this was no way to live. If she didn’t fight for her future, who would?

“I love you,” she said quietly. “If I’m stronger, it’s because I’ve stopped denying that. Maybe there’s a lesson in there for you, too. Loving me doesn’t make you weak, Cole. It takes a strong man to forgive.”

Before he could respond to the challenge of that, she walked out of his room and headed back to her own for what she prayed would be the last time. She would give him until tomorrow to come for her, to say that he was willing to try.

And just in case he stayed stubbornly away, she would begin to pack her bags.

Chapter Fifteen

Cole spent a long, lonely night after Cassie left his bed. He cursed himself for letting it come to this, for weakening his stance, for letting his determination slip.

He debated with himself for hours, wanting one thing, needing another and hating himself because of it. She had betrayed him. She wasn’t to be trusted. It was as simple—as black and white—as that.

But it wasn’t. It was murky as hell. Maybe there weren’t any rights or wrongs. Maybe there wasn’t any such thing as justice when emotions were involved. Maybe what was in his heart was all that mattered.

If only he knew precisely what that was. Until today he’d been able to convince himself that he’d married Cassie only so he wouldn’t have to fight her for custody of Jake. He’d seen himself as the magnanimous one. Practically a saint, he thought wryly.

But, holding her in his arms, burying himself deep inside her, he had known better. He was no saint. Far from it. Just as she’d said, he had married her because he couldn’t bear the thought of losing her for a second time.

But that was exactly what was going to happen if he didn’t get over the anger that ate at him during every waking minute. He’d seen the determination in her eyes last night and again this morning before she’d left for work. She would go, even if that meant a court fight. That she would risk so much proved to him just how serious she was. She wanted all or nothing.

There was only one problem. He wasn’t at all sure he could give her what she wanted, not without resentment bubbling up. What chance would they have if it was always there, just below the surface, something to throw in her face whenever they hit a rough patch?

Just let it go, forgive and forget. If