Dirty Playboy - Alex Wolf Page 0,88

of ethical or moral decisions. I kept everything black and white, but now, I’m at a crossroads. Everything is so nuanced and the black and white has completely run together. My life is a giant gray mass, and I don’t know how to deal with it. There’s no way I can go to sleep, knowing he’s out there, knowing he might be in trouble.

I open the New Testament, just hoping and praying with everything in me I’ll land on the right passage. Something that gives me guidance, strength, because I’m breaking all over again, one hour after another. I’m decaying from the inside. I try to make out the words on the page, but my vision blurs from the tears. I heave and sob, unable to get this anger and hurt to leave my body. I just want it gone. I just want five minutes of clarity, of peace.

Why won’t God give that to me?

My tears roll from my cheeks and soak the pages, blotting some of the red words. It’s so bad, I finally slam the book shut and just fall to my knees on the floor.

I close my eyes and just pray, harder than I’ve ever prayed in my life. I pray for Rick’s safety, pray for help, pray for understanding. I make every promise there is to God, like desperate people do. I plead with Him to just give me a sign, anything. I literally beg Him, out loud. I run through all the list of classic questions and demands. “I’ve never asked You for anything. I try to do what You want me to do. Just give me something, please! Can you please just give me something? Anything!”

Right at that moment, as I cry out, begging the Lord, my phone rings. There’s no way it can be a coincidence. My heart comes alive, knowing it’s God at work, and I fumble for the phone, my fingers trembling around it. I don’t recognize the number and I pray it’s anything helpful, Rick calling from an unknown number, the police just to tell me he’s safe, something comforting.

I answer the phone and croak out a breathless, “Hello?”

“Mary?”

My heart sinks when it’s not Rick, but I don’t lose hope. “Who-who is this?”

There’s a long silence that stretches into the night. “Wells Covington.”

My jaw clenches. All the anger and hurt returns. This wasn’t the sign from God I wanted. “What do you want? Is this about Rick?”

“I’m afraid so.”

My heart drops, fearing the worst, knowing nothing good can come from Covington. “Is-is he okay? Did something happen?”

“Yes, but he’s fine. At least, for now.”

Relief washes over me, but I need more information. He’s in trouble. I have to help him, do anything for him. Without thinking, I shout, “What happened?”

I close my eyes, bracing myself for whatever he can tell me. Over and over in my head I pray it’s something we can work through, pray it’s something that’ll pass, and it’s just bad in the moment, but we can get through it, together.

“Rick was just arrested with his father. They tried to break into a property of mine and steal proprietary trading information. I thought you should know, before you found out about it at the office tomorrow.”

My heart should sink, but it doesn’t. A spark of hope comes out of it, because as bad as that sounds, it could be so much worse. Plus, there’s a reason it happened, and I know it’s something we can work through. This is not the end of the world. “But Rick’s okay?”

He lets out a long sigh. “Mary, Rick—the Rick you know…” He pauses for a long time, drawing this out unnecessarily.

“Just say what you need to say. Stop dragging this out.”

“His real name is Dominic Romano.”

I half want to laugh at him. This is absurd. “Wait what? What are you talking about?”

“He’s a wanted felon from years ago. He changed his identity to elude the police. He’s not even allowed to have a PI license. It’s all a charade. He’s a con man. He was playing everyone the whole time, including you. I’m sorry, but I thought you should know.” He hangs up before I can respond.

And in that moment, my heart shatters into tiny little pieces. I don’t want to believe him, but I’ve been naïve my entire life, and a part of me knows he’s telling the truth whether I want to believe it or not.

Could Rick have faked his feelings for me? If he’s a professional con