Dirty Desires - Crystal Kaswell Page 0,74

drunk."

"I wanted you to when I was sober."

"I know. I want you to be sober. I want you to remember every second. Not a haze of pain and pleasure." He leans down. Kisses me again. "I'll be a few hours with Ty. Call me if you need anything."

"Will you fuck me tonight?"

He chuckles. "In the morning."

"Is that a promise?"

"Let's see if you're hungover first, vixen."

"If I'm not?"

"Then yes. It's a promise." He squeezes my hand. "Get some rest."

"Will you leave?"

"Now?"

"After you fuck me? Will that be it?" The words spill from my lips. Stupid gin erasing my inhibitions. "Will you be tired of me. Like with the other women?"

"No."

"You promise?"

"No."

"Oh."

"It's happened before. But… that isn't how I feel about you, Eve. There are too many things I want to learn about you. Too many things I want to teach you."

"Oh."

"Oh?"

"It sounds like a promise."

His voice softens. "Get some rest, vixen. You'll feel better."

"I feel fine."

"Then get up. Shower. Watch TV. But no swimming alone."

"I'm a strong swimmer."

"I don't care. You're pissed. You're not swimming alone." His voice drops to a firm tone. Worried. Angry even. "I wouldn't forgive myself if something happened to you."

"You wouldn't?"

"Never. It would break my heart." He kisses me one more time.

Then he leaves.

He presses the door into the frame softly. His footsteps move down the stairs.

It means something.

Maybe it means everything.

But I can't put the pieces together at the moment. He's right. I'm drunk. Everything is a blur of pain and pleasure.

God, what a way to describe existence.

One big blur of pain and pleasure.

All this desire. For everything he's willing to give me. And everything he isn't willing to give too.

Chapter Forty-Three

Ian

"Jesus, Ian, did you at least wait until her eighteenth birthday?" Ty shakes his head. He laughs sounds like you. "I thought I was the depraved pervert."

"Based on what?"

He chuckles fair enough. Motions to the cocktail glasses on the table. Another round?

Was I this bad when Laura left?

No, I was worse. Much worse. Pissed for weeks straight.

When I finally sobered up, I ran three thousand miles away.

He's doing both at once. But then he's always been smarter.

"One more," I say.

"Getting old?" he asks.

"You'll be there soon."

He chuckles as he pours two more glasses. "What's there to see around here?"

I motion to the beach in front of us. Through the sliding glass doors.

It's beautiful. Like something from an American TV show. No flaws in sight.

"You're going out in that?" he asks.

"You sound like Eve."

He shakes his head I don't know what the hell to do with you. "Fuck, she's so young I can't even mock you for it. If she was twenty-two, it would be borderline. Worth discussing. But she's starting college in what…"

"Next month."

He chuckles fuck, you're ridiculous. It's easy. The easiest he's been all night.

But then it's always easier focusing on other people's problems.

I can handle the inquisition if it's what he needs.

Ty continues, "You asked about my schedule three weeks ago."

"So?"

He moves through the living room. Motions for me to follow.

I do away with my shoes and socks. Follow him into the sand.

It's dark now. The sky is a deep shade of blue. The stars are shining bright.

Between the quiet roar of the waves, the smell of salt, and the soft breeze, this place is a picture-perfect beach.

"You started reading Atwood books five months ago," he says.

"I didn't realize you kept tabs."

"You couldn't stop talking about them."

"Great literature."

"Since when do you read great literature?" He takes a long sip. "And don't say Lee Child is literature."

"It's not my fault you don't appreciate a good mystery."

He rolls his eyes. Not in a dismissive way. In that playful Ty way of his. The way that says you're so full of shit you're covered in it. Don't expect me to buy it. "You kept talking about the woman who recommended them. Her… obsession. Her intellect. Her wit. You were talking about her, weren't you?"

"If I was?"

"Are you going to tell me you only met her a few weeks ago?"

I say nothing.

He laughs. "You think the poker face works on me? I was there every minute of your divorce. You may have convinced Mum you're okay, but you've never fooled me."

"I am okay."

He shakes his head still not buying it. "You don't look okay. You look… Happy."

"Jesus, the indignity. I look happy? Thank fuck you've told me so I can correct this immediately."

"You're in love with her."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"I'm the ridiculous one?"

"Yes."

"Not you?" he asks. "Lying to yourself. Trying to sell me this story about how