Didn't Expect You (Against All Odds #2) - Claudia Burgoa Page 0,40
what I’m feeling anymore.”
“Call if you need me, okay?”
After he hangs up, I find some courage to grab the boxes, head to the bathroom, and use the first test. According to the box, two lines means pregnant. The longest sixty seconds of my existence pass, and after I look at the small window I feel my blood draining, so I try the next test. Then another one. And when I’m done with the seven, all of them agree. My entire world just flipped.
Sixteen
Nyx
And just like that, my world went sideways. I don’t think it’s upside down. Perhaps it is downside up, and there’s no way to put it back in the right place.
Ever.
I’ve heard that having a kid is life changing and when one learns about them, it is the happiest day of one’s life. My future has gone from frightening to scary as hell. I cried for an entire night—and I’ve yet to find my happiness. On Wednesday morning I can barely open my eyes. My phone is dead, and when I have enough energy to charge it, there are several texts from Nate.
Nate: Are you okay?
Nate: Answer your phone.
Nate: Why is my call going to voicemail?
Nate: Nyx, I need to know that you’re okay or I’ll call the National Guard.
Nate: Please, call me.
Nyx: My phone died. Please, don’t send anyone to check on me.
Nate: How are you?
Nyx: I’ll be fine.
Nate: I don’t like the sound of that.
I stare at the phone that begins ringing. I decline the call.
Nyx: I promise to call you once I can talk.
Nate: Why can’t we talk now?
Nyx: I’m not in a good place.
He doesn’t respond and I sigh with relief. I’m usually the stubborn one who doesn’t let go until I am sure the person on the other line is okay. My siblings drop it the moment I say I need time. This guy takes more than one text to give me space. In all honesty, I’m not sure if I want the space.
My life has gone from perfect to terrifying. This is one of those times where I’d appreciate if someone could lie to me and say, it’s going to be okay. I mean, it might not be a lie, but there’s no guarantee that they’ll be right. Our future isn’t set in stone so who really knows how my life will be in a year.
I place a pin on my feelings because it’s a lot easier to focus on objective goals. But before I start working, I place chilled black tea bags over my eyes to get rid of the swelling. This is something I learned from Mom. I might as well start following all her home remedies if I want to survive these next nine months. Once I feel ready to sit down to find a new path, I get lost in the possibilities.
Twenty-four hours later and two days after my life crumbled, I feel more confident about my future. I shower, go for a jog around the neighborhood, and even stop at the coffee place to buy a vanilla steamer and a pastry.
Around lunch time, I go to the grocery store with a list of what I plan to eat for the next couple of days. Skipping meals for the sake of my career wasn’t smart. Now, I can take better care of myself—and my future baby.
That’s the one part of my life that hasn’t sunk in yet. I’m going to be a mother. This is one endeavor I hadn’t planned yet. Just last weekend I was wondering if thirty-five was too early to have a kid. It’s not a choice if I wait or not. I decided to have this baby. Since I like to read and learn while reading, on my way back home, I stop at the bookstore.
When I arrive at my place, I spot Nate’s truck parked in my driveway. There’s just enough space for me to slide my car into the garage. So much for let me call you when I am up for it. The strange thing is that my shoulder muscles relax when I drive close to him and he smiles at me.
When I turn off the engine, he opens the door and says, “I was about to call search and rescue. Where have you been?”
I pop the trunk open and answer, “Grocery store?”
He takes me into his arms and rubs my back. “Fuck, I couldn’t sleep for two days. You said you’d call me, and I haven’t heard from you.”