The Devil's CrownPart Two - Monica James Page 0,65
unheard of. And that’s why it’ll work.
Pavel will continue working over the underdogs as we grow stronger quietly, only to take down the existing adversaries who stand in our way. I have a vision. And I’m prepared to make a deal with the devil if I have to.
However, looking down at the ring I wear on my pinkie finger, I smile—I am the devil. Welcome to my hell.
“And what if the Macrillos get wind of this somehow? We still don’t know if we can trust Austin.”
“Catholics in Protestant territory? I don’t think so. Besides, how will they find out? It’s not like they’re associates of Austin. Never underestimate a man’s desire to succeed.”
Austin will agree as this benefits him, and the IRA. This alliance benefits us both.
“Does Ella know of this plan?”
Sighing, my high soon fades because if only I told her of my plans from the get-go, we wouldn’t be here.
“Not yet. I’ll tell her in the morning. Can you organize someone to meet me in Latvia? I need some new identification for us, just in case.”
“Yes, of course. I will organize everything and send word on where to meet.”
“Perfect. I’ll call you once we get to the port. Keep me updated with any news.”
“How is she?” Pavel asks, which surprises me. He isn’t one to meddle, but Ella has touched us all.
“Her bruises are healing, but her internal scars have caused the most damage as have I,” I declare with regret. “The best thing I can do is leave her be.”
Pavel is quiet, which is never a good sign. “Best for whom?”
Not in the mood for this type of talk, I cluck my tongue. “Good night,” and I hang up.
The heaviness returns, but I push it aside. I have a plan, and that’s all I intend to focus on. I need to get Ella to safety where I will disappear from her life—a fleeting moment that will soon be forgotten.
Ella
EVEN THOUGH MY injuries are healing, the heaviness in my heart just seems to worsen with each passing minute.
Alek hasn’t spoken to me. Not that I blame him. We’re broken, and I don’t know if we can fix it. But I meant what I said; even though I love Alek, I’ll always associate this sorrow inside me with him. His world has taken so much from me that I don’t even know who I am anymore.
I don’t blame him, though. I blame myself because every choice was mine to make. Alek never asked me to do any of this. It was all me. If I had the chance to start over, I don’t know what I’d choose.
My heart is broken for so many reasons, and this is why I’ve built up my walls. I don’t want to tell Alek what happened because I don’t want pity. It’ll kill me to have him look at me any differently, to have him look at me like a victim.
I wish I could stop thinking this way, but no matter what Alek says, his past actions prove he will always see me as some damsel who needs rescuing. If I tell him what happened, what Santo and Frank did, he will blame himself and forever be trying to make it up to me.
I appreciate him wanting to protect me, but for this to work, I want to be his equal. I don’t want him to be fighting my battles constantly. I took care of Frank on my own, didn’t I?
Pushing him away is the only thing that feels right in a world that is filled with so much wrong. I know it doesn’t make sense, but I just want to heal on my own. I don’t want to answer his questions because I don’t want to relive those experiences ever again.
I’m on the cusp of wanting to forget it ever happened, and then on the flip side, I’m so fucking angry I didn’t do more. I’m so messed up. Any shrink would tell me I’m repressing my feelings instead of dealing with them. But I just can’t deal—period.
I’m guessing we will reach the port soon. I’m not entirely sure what plans Alek has for me, which is why I’ll need to talk to him. The thought has me piling my hair onto the top of my head into a messy bun because I’m suddenly burning up.
My hand, or rather, my ring gets snagged in my hair, reminding me that I’m still wearing Frank’s engagement ring. Prying it off my finger, I’m tempted to