Delivering His Gifts (Mountain Men of Liberty #10)- K.C. Crowne Page 0,36

gathered some plates and silverware. I placed the boxes of food on the table. One biscuit and gravy for him, one for me, and an order of bacon to share.

Calvin sat down across from me just as I took a seat myself.

“So if there’s no problems, are you finally admitting that you have feelings for the woman?”

I grabbed a piece of bacon and stuffed it in my mouth, clearly a tactic to avoid answering the question right away. Calvin cocked his brow.

“No, not exactly.” I wasn’t sure if I could say the words.

“Then out with it, son. It’s clear you came over here to talk, so talk.”

I took a heaping forkful of biscuits and sausage gravy and chowed down, again, buying time. Calvin dug into his own meal but kept his eyes on me, letting me know I wasn’t off the hook simply by shoving huge bites into my mouth.

Finally, after a few moments of awkward silence and pointed looks from Calvin, I blurted out, “She’s pregnant.”

The words felt surreal. It didn’t even sound like my voice.

Calvin dropped the piece of bacon he was holding and pretended he did it on purpose by dragging it through the gravy before picking it up again. After clearing the shock from his throat, he asked, “And it’s your baby, I presume?”

I nodded.

“Damn liar,” he grumbled. “I said there was something going on between the two of you, but you insisted there wasn’t.”

“I know, Calvin,” I sighed. “It was just one time, I swear.” Or two if you counted the night before.

“It only takes one time,” Calvin said. “But clearly you know that already.”

I didn’t respond, I just went back to eating, even though I suddenly found myself not very hungry. Even though I had the best biscuits and gravy sitting right in front of me, I no longer had a desire to eat. I put my fork down and pushed my food away.

“I suppose congratulations are in order?” Calvin posed it as a question.

“I don’t know,” I answered.

“Come on, Mason. You and Danielle clearly have chemistry, and a baby! Babies are always a cause for celebration.”

He was trying to be cheerful, or maybe he truly felt happy for me. I’d never asked Calvin about what he thought of kids. He never had any, so I had assumed he never wanted them, but he was gay, and in his time, that wasn’t an accepted lifestyle choice. He wouldn’t have been able to adopt, much less consider any other options for having children naturally.

From the way he’d interacted with Skyler, and from his response to my news, it became clear - he apparently did have a soft spot for kids. Which made me sad that he’d never had his happily ever after, and possibly never would.

“You don’t look that happy about it,” he said slowly.

“Well, to be fair, I’m not unhappy. I like kids. I’m just not sure I’ll make a good father. My own dad was hardly around when I was growing up. I had my grandpa until he passed away, but he wasn’t that great with kids. I don’t even know what a hands-on father figure really looks like.” My chest tightened as I thought about everything that came with fatherhood. I had always tried to avoid being responsible for another person’s well-being, which was why I hadn’t dated since losing Katie.

“Ah, but no one thinks they’ll make a good father. Everyone worries they’ll be terrible at it, and sure, everyone makes mistakes. But I believe the people who do worry about being a good parent make the best parents.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because they always strive to be better.”

“Huh,” I said, mulling over his words.

“And I know there’s more to it than that, because I know you, Mason.”

“What do you mean?”

“The stuff with Katie. I know you’re afraid to be responsible for anyone but let me tell you - what happened with her was a freak incident. It’s not something that happens every day, especially when you’re not engaged in war. Civilian life is a lot safer, even if sometimes it doesn’t feel that way.” He lowered his voice toward the end.

Calvin continued eating his breakfast, and we sat in silence, eating our meals. I thought over his words, and I knew he was right. It was very unlikely that someone I loved would get caught in a missile attack or drive over an IED in Liberty. But there were so many other ways to lose someone - and when it came to a defenseless