Defining Darkness - K E Osborn Page 0,62

bearable.”

How do I answer that?

After Nycto opening up to me, I can only imagine what hell he went through as a kid. I bet it didn’t even scratch the surface as to what he went through with those boys in that godforsaken home. All I know is I don’t want to be another reason he falls off the deep end. Maybe I need to go back in, talk this out with them. Maybe I need to stop wallowing in their selfishness and try to hold onto whatever good they were trying to accomplish.

“Thanks for coming out here, Trix, to find me. I was ready to fall apart before you came out here.”

She pulls me to her for a long hug. “Nycto and Ivy were too busy arguing over who should follow you that I just stormed out saying neither of them should. It would only make the situation worse. They both adore you, Eva. They only want what’s right for you, even if they both show it in a roundabout way.”

I pull back from her embrace. I understand where she’s coming from. I don’t have to like it, but I understand. “Okay… let’s go back in and face the music.”

Trixie stands, holding out her small hand to me. I take it, and she hoists me from the ground. She wraps her arm around my shoulder supportively as we start the trek around the bunker to head back inside. My stomach rolls with nerves as we head down the concrete ramp toward the door.

Taking in a deep breath, I steady my shoulders walking through the clubhouse doors. Everyone’s going about their usual shit. I’m not sure why, but I was expecting them to all be waiting for me.

I’m not that important.

I need to get a handle on myself.

A few eyes glance up as we walk in, they give Trixie a head bob. Obviously, she’s done her job well. My eyes focus on Ivy, Nycto, and Void, who are all sitting at the bar drowning their sorrows in liquor. I’m the reason they’re drinking. While I feel bad, they’re the reason I am so damn angry.

We all have a part to play in this.

“Prez,” Trixie calls out, making Nycto swivel on his stool along with Ivy and Void.

They face me, I cross my arms over my chest defiantly. I might be coming in here to clear things up, but I’m not coming in with my tail between my legs and rolling over.

Nycto throws what’s left of his drink down the hatch, then stands and walks toward me. “You’ve been crying?” He steps right up in front of me, his leather and sandalwood scent hits right in my senses, and it causes me to waver slightly.

“What did you expect? For me to accept you all played me like a damn idiot?”

Nycto’s eyes fall as he reaches out for my hand. I let him take it. That fucking spark I always have when he touches me ignites, slamming straight into my chest.

He curls up his lip like he’s inwardly berating himself before he speaks. “You have no idea what it was like hiding Ivy from you, Eva. Knowing I should tell you she was here. To stop the charade and unite you both.”

“And why the hell didn’t you, Nycto. You have to understand why I don’t get it? You knew the pain I was in.”

His eyes meet mine, a pleading behind their gaze. “I’m fucking shit at how to do this, Eva. I’ve never, ever, had a woman take my interest. So, when you came along, all I wanted was to make you happy. I knew Ivy was the key, and as soon as you guys were reunited, I wouldn’t even be a blip on your radar.”

“You don’t know that! How could you possibly know what I would have done? You didn’t even give me a chance. I would have been so grateful to you for taking her as well as me…” I pause and close my eyes, taking a deep breath, then open them again. “Don’t you see, Nycto? Yes, I would have wanted to spend my time with Ivy, but I would have been thankful to you also. We would have owed you so much. Now, I don’t know what to think.”

“I’m still the same guy, Eva. I took your sister to keep you together. You have to understand what I did. Keeping you from her, I did it for us.”

I roll my shoulders. “Nycto, I’m stuck in this clubhouse with you