Defect - By Ryann Kerekes Page 0,44
know, a gun would have been more helpful.”
“I was worried you’d hurt yourself.”
I’m stunned for a second that he actually considered it. “You were more worried about me handling a gun than you were about me taking on a wolf with my bare hands?”
“Not with your bare hands – I gave you a knife.” He smiles. “And that wolf didn’t stand a chance.” He believes in me too much. It makes my stomach cramp with nerves. I want him to believe I’m this person he thinks I am, yet I’m terrified I’m not; when he discovers the truth, I’ll be letting him down.
I shudder when I remember what I did to the wolf. I’m glad he doesn’t ask what happened.
“Are you cold?” he asks.
“A little, not too bad,” I lie. The temperature has dropped rapidly since the sun went down.
“It’s okay to be cold, Eve. You’re allowed to show some weakness.” He shrugs out of his jacket and places it around my shoulders.
“Um, thanks,” I mumble. I pull it closed in front of me. It smells like him. I breathe in the scent, trying to be inconspicuous, but after smelling nothing but dirt and trees all day, the scent is comforting and wraps me in warmth. “So won’t you get in trouble if they see your dot next to mine – I mean, shouldn’t you get going?”
He sits up straighter. “No. I’m the only one on overnight duty tonight. But you’re right; I probably shouldn’t stay too long anyway. Just in case.”
I play with the bandage on my hand, tightening the tape. I sometimes find myself forgetting he’s in charge.
Will notices and reaches for my hand. “Let me see.” He turns my palm over and unwinds the tape. The cut is stained with dried blood, and even in just the moonlight, I can tell it doesn’t look good. Without dropping my hand, Will reaches into his backpack. He removes a jar of medication. He unscrews the lid, and the minty smell of it makes me smile. He scoops some up and dabs it gently across my cut. His hands are huge, and strong, yet his touch is soft, careful. It surprises me. When the cut is covered with the balm, he re-wraps my hand with a clean bandage.
We’re quiet for a few moments, just listening to the sounds of the woods at night. The trees creak and groan in the light breeze. The leaves rustle on the ground. The stars are mostly muted, but the moon is bright enough to see by. My mother always loved the moon. It’s kind of an odd thing to love. But sometimes, I’d catch her at the window, just staring at it, letting it bask her face in its bluish glow. I tip my chin to it and close my eyes, making a silent wish for my mother.
“You’ve never asked about how I ended up here,” Wills says, pulling me from the moment.
“Nope,” I say.
“Aren’t you curious?” He shifts so he’s facing me. His eyes on me are too much. My cheeks flood with heat. I turn so I’m looking out into the woods.
“Ah, not really. I heard you hold the record for staying in training for three years. The rest, I don’t really care about.”
He nods, looking thoughtful, trying to find whatever it is I’m focused on in the woods. “Well, if you want to know, I’ll tell you. That way, there won’t be any secrets between us.”
I turn toward him. “No. That’s okay; I don’t want to know. We’re more even this way.” I smile. “Since we don’t know what’s wrong with me … I don’t need to know what they found in you.”
His face turns serious. “There is nothing wrong with you.” I’m quiet for a few seconds, considering his words. He is the only one here who believes that, and it’s nice to know there’s someone who thinks so. “Well, if you change your mind, the offer stands – you can always just ask,” he says.
“Maybe instead you could tell me about your life before you came here,” I suggest, realizing I really don’t know much about him.
“What do you want to know?”
“Anything.”
He’s quiet for a second, like it takes considerable effort to remember back to his life before this place. “I have a brother, Stephen, who’s fifteen. He’ll be getting his mindscan in a few months.”
I nod, unsure what to say. I know if Stephen does get stuck here, Will will look out for him, just like he’s done