Boats and ropes went together. She found a piece of blue plastic rope—
too short. In the next boat there was a longer rope. She didn’t know whether it would be enough, but she had no time to keep searching.
She didn’t mull it over, just grabbed it and tied it around her waist. It would have to do, one way or the other. She handed the other end of
the rope to the woman, who still was holding the radio to her ear and thus had no hand free to hold Lina back. Lina gave her no time to
protest. She ran into the water. She remembered her vacation on the
Atlantic. The surf hadn’t been any higher, but there was also a breeze, 317
Maria C. Poets
and sunshine, a special beach, the smells and sounds—everything had
been different. Most of all, it hadn’t been a matter of life and death.
Yes, it really was life or death, and she might die. No matter, still better than just standing there and watching Max die—and then live for the
rest of her life with the thought that she hadn’t done anything or tried hard enough.
She was so frozen through that the water felt warm. When her
head was submerged once, everything turned absolutely quiet and a
low calming noise clogged up her ears. She came up again and homed
in on the little orange dot before dipping under the water again, swim-ming a few strokes, and then breaking the surface of the water again.
There was no ground anymore. The current pulled at her and propelled her toward the little light dot. She dove again, pulling with strokes she thought were powerful, but which in reality were just helpless paddling.
Coming up again, she gasped for air, swallowed water, spluttered, and screamed. She was screaming with rage because she didn’t want to die here, in the old, harmless Baltic Sea, because she’d been stupid enough to think she could save Max. Max who was nothing but a colleague,
just someone she knew from work, who had been equally stupid trying
to save a guy who had already killed once, maybe even twice. So why, why did Max, that idiot, want to save this Birkner fellow? Who cared if he drowned? Who cared if Max drowned? Damn!
Suddenly the orange spot was directly in front of her. Something
pulled her up and kept her head above water. She coughed a few times and then took a deep breath—clear rainy air with almost no seawater.
Max’s head stuck out from the safety vest. He held Lukas Birkner with one hand and Lina with the other. When she could think again, she
gestured and he let her go. She could feel the pull of the rope around her stomach. Lina helped Max hold on to Birkner, who was completely
exhausted. She clutched the safety vest and with it Max for good measure, and slowly they were being pulled ashore. The DLRG woman had
received backup: three, four, five men with red vests, ropes, flashlights, 318
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and blankets. They pulled on the thin rope that cut into Lina’s stomach. She wheezed and gasped for air, again swallowed some water, and kicked with her legs until her feet touched stones again, solid ground, the beach, the saving shoreline. Hands grabbed her, pulling her up
and carrying her away from the water that had wanted to kill her. The Baltic Sea also reluctantly released Max and Birkner and then retreated with a roar.
They put Lina down at the foot of the wooden staircase, and soon
afterward Max, whose eyes were closed and who was lying more than
sitting. Lina crawled to him, her teeth chattering. When she reached him, she took his face in her hands.
“Max,” she whispered, “Max.” What she wanted to say was: You’re
a real idiot—why did you do that? You could have died and would it
have been worth it—for a guy like that, a murderer, a wife beater, a man who has done so many evil things? But she knew what he would
reply: Yes, it’s worth it. Besides, she wasn’t strong enough for too many words, and so she just said over and over, “Max. Max.”
He slowly opened his eyes.
“Lina,” he said and looked at her.
Just then, one of the DLRG men grabbed her arm and pulled her
up. “Come now,” he shouted in her ear. “We’ve got to get out of here.”
Lina straightened herself and someone put a blanket around her
shoulders. She only noticed now that her entire body was shaking. The man wanted to help her up the stairs, but she pushed his