days I’d been in Tanner’s room with him, not allowed to step outside. I wasn’t sure why I was being allowed to leave now—maybe they finally believed that I never intended to go back to my father. Or perhaps Styx was so overcome with happiness at being a new father that he was being overly lenient. It didn’t matter. What mattered was that I was leaving this room, the safe bubble in which I had found comfort, my small bubble with Tanner.
On seeing my nerves, Tanner turned me from the mirror to face him. He gently dropped his forehead to mine. “You’ll be fine.”
I gave him a forced smile. “I’m Adelita Quintana; of course I will.” Though my family name suddenly didn’t fill me with much confidence.
Tanner didn’t smile back at me. Taking hold of my left hand, he brought it between us, running his thumb over the place his cotton engagement ring once sat. “One day, Lita . . . One day you won’t be a Quintana.” My breathing hitched and a lump clogged my throat at the telltale emotional gravel in Tanner’s voice. His blue eyes met mine. “One day, hopefully soon, you’ll be an Ayers.” He exhaled like it was a breath he had been holding for an eternity. “One day soon, after all these years apart, of fighting and fucking working to make this happen, you’ll finally be mine.”
My hand shook as he spoke those words. It was my greatest dream too. Not to be rich. I’d been rich my entire life and still felt alone. My greatest wish in life was simple. It was him. My Tanner.
“Yes,” I announced, as though he had once again proposed. I kissed the finger that would wear his wedding band. “Soon.” I closed my eyes for a few seconds and let myself imagine what that moment would be like. The moment I said “I do.” The moment Tanner and I wore wedding bands and the priest pronounced us man and wife.
Adela Elizebetta Quintana Ayers.
I frowned. In my culture, we kept our family’s name and took our husband’s name too. But the Quintana name to me now was ruined.
Adelita Ayers . . . I smiled. It felt . . . right.
The coil of dread that had resided in me since I came back to Tanner grew tighter still, fear chasing away any other dominant emotion. But I pushed it aside, willing myself to ignore the persistent feeling that this couldn’t last. I would embrace the moment. And right now, after years of seeking a safe place for us to be together, Tanner was introducing me to his friends as his old lady.
I knew this meant the world to him.
Gripping my hand in his, Tanner led us from the room that had become my sanctuary, and toward a bar. The sound coming from inside was deafening as we approached. If Tanner felt my hand trembling, he was polite enough not to let me know. I took a deep breath as Tanner opened the door. The place was packed. I knew the clubhouse and the grounds outside were full of other men from all over the southern states of the US. But seeing them all congregating in one place was more than overwhelming.
Tanner craned his neck above the sea of men, and then waved at someone over the crowd. Some of the men looked at us as we passed, but not as much as I feared. I relaxed some when my being in the room, holding Tanner’s hand, didn’t garner as much attention I as I thought it would.
When we broke through the throng, it was to see Beauty sitting with other familiar faces. The man beside her got to his feet, as did Beauty. Tank. Beauty was smiling widely at me. “Hey, darlin’!” she said, and came around the table. I froze as Beauty threw her arms around my neck. I quickly looked to Tanner, who let go of my hand. The corner of his lip was pulled up in humor.
When Beauty let go, I said, “Hello, again.”
Beauty put her hand on Tank’s shoulder. “Now that things aren’t so fucked up, this, Adelita, is Tank. My man and Tanner’s best friend.”
Tank gave me a tight smile, then held out his hand. I shook it, and said, “Thank you for being such a good friend to Tanner.”
Tank seemed taken back by my words. Like he didn’t know that Tanner would’ve spoken so highly of him. Or maybe that he’d even told me