And my heart . . . my heart was shredding, each slice of flesh that fell away causing me to suck in a tight breath as the agony took hold of my entire body. All the time I feared I was falling apart, Diego never let go of my hand, bringing it to his mouth to kiss as he talked to the cartel men over dinner.
As with my father, Diego wasn’t a man to be crossed. I’d heard the rumors, And Charley had informed me of some home truths. Some activities he got up to in California when he was there on “family business”. Of what he’d done to past lovers. The pain I’d heard he had caused them. The roughness with which he’d handled them. He was an aggressive man. To me, he had only ever been sweet. But he was feared by the men at this table. Even my father, due to his age, wanted to keep Diego close. The alternative wouldn’t be worth risking.
If I was honest with myself . . . I feared him too. I feared what would happen if I refused him. It didn’t bear thinking about.
I had always sensed something unstable within him. I had always kept him at arm’s length. But now I was firmly in his embrace . . . and I had to find a way to survive the suffocation.
Diego had been bold in his move to propose to me. It was his greatest play. He was as close as one could get to my father. My hand in marriage would firmly lock him in place. My father wasn’t na?ve to this. Papa knew how Diego had always wanted me. And to secure Diego’s unwavering loyalty, he’d thrown me to the wolves. I didn’t know how to get out of this. I didn’t know how to break off this engagement. I didn’t know where Tanner even was. I knew my father and Diego were still working with the Klan. But they no longer came to our house. All those months of being with Tanner, being able to have him in my bed, by my side, had long gone.
Ice flooded my veins when I thought of the inevitable. The day when the Klan and the cartel would go to war against each other. This pact they had entered into wouldn’t last—couldn’t last. My enemy’s enemy is my friend.
Once the Hangmen were dealt with, and when the contract they had entered into expired . . . war would ensue. It would be cartel against Klan. A fight to be the strongest power in the crime underworld. My stomach flipped at the thought. At the knowledge that the man I loved and my family, the only people I cared about in this world, would be intent on killing each other.
“Let me walk you to your suite,” Diego said as he got up from the table. He guided me up with his hand, and I let him lead me away. My father kissed my free hand as I passed. I smiled, but only for the sake of keeping up appearances.
As we approached the rooms I had as my own on my papa’s estate, Diego’s hand tightened in mine. He hurried us through the hallways, my father’s men stationed along the way for our protection. When we entered my suite, Diego spun me around and pushed me back against the wall. My heart raced. His eyes were wide and he licked his lips. He took hold of both my wrists and slowly raised them above my head. He moved in to my lips, but I turned my head away at the last minute. “Diego,” I whispered, clenching my eyes shut as I gathered my lost breath. “Not yet . . .”
His forehead fell against mine. He was pressed against me; his scent infused the air around us and I could smell the red wine on his breath. He had drunk a lot. “Adelita,” he murmured, frustrated. “Cari?o . . .” I winced at the term of endearment. I didn’t want to be his cari?o. I didn’t want to be anything to him. He moved one of his hands from my wrists and slid it down my hair, over my cheek, and down to my chest. I whimpered when he palmed my breast.
“Diego—”
“Shh.” His hand squeezed at the flesh until it bordered on painful.
“You’re hurting me.”
He smiled, and it wasn’t a smile I had ever received from him before. His attention on