Dark Promise (Darkhaven Saga #3) - Danielle Rose Page 0,10
isn’t funny, Jasik,” I say, seething.
“Well—”
“Well what?”
“It is a little funny.” He shows me just how funny he thinks it is with his thumb and index finger.
Exasperated, I exhale sharply and turn on my heel to continue patrolling. “I don’t expect you to understand. Do you even have a best friend? I mean, when was the last time someone actually wanted to spend time with you as opposed to being forced to courtesy of Queen Amicia?”
He stops walking. I don’t see him, but I hear the sudden halt of his feet. The untouched snow before him should be marked with his shoe prints, but it’s not. The vacant white abyss beside me nearly chokes the life from my body. I turn to face him, immediately regretting my words.
“Jasik…” I shake my head, searching for something to say that would justify my behavior. I went too far. I was too harsh. I can’t believe I took out my frustration on the one person I actually care to be around right now.
“It’s okay. You’re upset,” he says, shrugging off my concern as he walks toward me.
He plays it cool, like my words don’t affect him, but I see the shock and sadness in his eyes. Pointing out that he has essentially been alone—without his blood family and childhood friends—for far too many years was a low blow on my part. I had no right to be such a jerk. A hundred years from now, the last thing I’d want is to be reminded that everyone I ever loved is dead—and that I’ll never see them again.
“No, it’s not. It’s never okay for me to talk to you like that. I didn’t mean what I said.”
“Vampires live a different life than mortals,” Jasik says.
“I know.”
“We don’t necessarily get to choose our sires or our subsequent obligations after the transition.”
What kills me more than that quick flash of pain behind his eyes is the fact that he feels the need to justify himself to me. He doesn’t need to explain why he lives the way he lives or why his life has been focused on eradicating rogues rather than making friends.
“I know,” I say again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.”
“Hunters spend their lives protecting vampires,” he continues. “We don’t have time to make friends.”
I close the space between us and grab his hands. I squeeze them slightly and rub my thumbs over his cool skin. “I’m sorry.”
He smiles. “It’s okay.”
“I’m just upset. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.”
He shakes his head. “No, you shouldn’t have, but you should talk about it.”
I pull away from him and step back. “There isn’t anything to talk about.”
“Ava, stop this. I’m your sire. That’s not just some superficial bond. Being your sire means I am here for you, always. You can talk to me about anything.”
The moment I decide to tell him about the dark promise I made to Amicia, my throat closes. A knot so tight and thick forms, it prevents me from revealing my blood oath.
Misunderstanding my hesitation, Jasik continues. “I know you’re angry with Amicia’s decision, but is that all that’s bothering you?”
Again, I try to tell him what Amicia made me do, but I swallow my words. Something inside me is screaming to speak, to admit my fault, to explain the blood oath, but in that same breath, something else squashes the desire. I’m torn between admitting the truth and dealing with the fallout and living in blissful ignorance. Maybe my concern is for nothing. Maybe a blood promise is common and there really is nothing to worry about.
“Ava?” Jasik squints, eyes concerned. Right about now, he’s probably wishing he can read minds. I’m thankful he can’t.
Finally finding my voice, I say, “I just hate to abandon Liv. It’s not right. The cost of our feud shouldn’t be her death.”
Jasik exhales slowly, loudly, his eyes assessing me. “I agree.”
He knows I’m hiding something. His gaze is piercing, as if he can see straight through to my soul. I gnaw on my lower lip, waiting for him to continue.
“But Amicia has made her decision,” he says.
“And she speaks for all?” I ask, wondering how many others would have sided with me if they didn’t fear her backlash.
Jasik nods. “As long as we are members of her nest, she does.”
My heart sinks. Is this really how it will be from now on? If being a vampire means making enemies and helping those only deemed worthy by Amicia, then I want no part of