Could her father be capable of such an illusion? She doubted if he had knowledge of such caring. Of such sweetness.
Sívamet? Now I am really worried. You are afraid.
She was. Of him. Of taking a chance. Of letting someone into her life when they could tear her to shreds. I am fine.
You are sad.
So true. She was sad. Sad for herself. Sad for Elisabeta. Even sad for both their lifemates. She tried to live her life in a positive manner, but she didn’t know how to handle the present situation.
She had to give him something. Some truth. Even if he wasn’t real—and she suspected he truly was—he deserved truth just for making her feel as if he cared about her. I need to know you’re real.
There was a brief silence. You believe I am an illusion? Sent to you by this Barnabas? By your father?
She remained silent, afraid to think or move, frozen, paralyzed by her inability to know for certain.
I am on my way. There was decisiveness in his tone.
Abruptly he was gone, and she let out her breath, not realizing she’d been holding it. Elisabeta? She could still feel her friend, so still and quiet. What do you think?
He is very real. He is Carpathian. No mage could possibly produce that.
There it was. Confirmation. Julija didn’t know whether or not to be relieved, because now she actually had to make up her mind. Already, she’d insulted him and made him think poorly of her as a lifemate. He couldn’t possibly understand what her life had been like and why she’d been so terrified of ever opening herself up to trusting anyone, let alone the enemy. And she’d been led to believe Carpathians were the enemy. She just hadn’t believed an entire species could be.
I know you have to go. It was difficult to maintain their connection over so long a distance. Elisabeta was very powerful, whether she believed she was or not. I really appreciate you being my friend. She needed one. Desperately.
Elisabeta’s affection slipped into her mind, warming her. I have never had a friend before. I like having someone to talk to as well.
I’ll get back to the compound as soon as I’m done here, Julija promised.
I would like that. Elisabeta sounded and felt shy to her.
Before Julija could reply, Elisabeta had slipped away leaving her . . . alone. She patted both cats on the head and stood up, needing to move. She wasn’t wholly Carpathian. She could give the illusion of being clean, and she could cast a spell to clean her body and hair if necessary, but it didn’t feel like a real shower.
She looked around the cavern. As in most caves, water trickled from the walls. She studied the various paths of water. All led downward in little jagged trails, but one was wider than the others and formed a small puddle at the far end of the chamber. She might be able to do something with that. There was no rock to build up to form a barrier to give herself a pool or bath of any sort.
She was just standing there, frustrated, when she felt him come up behind her. There had been no warning, not even from the cats, and that told her more than anything else could have. They always reacted to her family, mostly slinking away in fear, or hissing their hatred and submission. The shadow cats chuffed softly in greeting and bumped into his legs, winding around them. He was so close, she felt the cats’ movements, but she didn’t feel him.
“I want to take a shower.” She blurted it out like a crazy person, but just his presence was overwhelming when she felt she had told him far too much about her life. She couldn’t face him, not with him knowing the worst about her. It was humiliating, and she couldn’t think about anything else, vividly remembering the way Barnabas had hurt and displayed her for his class.
“You are Carpathian, Julija,” he said softly, his voice whispering against her ear.
She felt her hair move with every breath he took. “I’m mage. I don’t understand what you mean.”
“If you wish a shower, you can create one for yourself. If you don’t want to bother, you simply can freshen yourself and change your attire.” He stepped out from behind her and walked in a slow half circle to stand in front of her. “You have already been doing it, probably most of your life.”