Dark Illusion - Christine Feehan Page 0,145

sharply. There was nothing mild about his expression. He wore his stone-face. Implacable. Filled with resolve.

“Isai . . .” She started hesitantly. He was upset with her. Isai didn’t get upset.

“Trapped me? You do not want to talk about it? You are my lifemate. You were born with the other half of my soul. We are destined to be together. You may not have wanted that fate, but you accepted it. We are tied together and there is no way to break that bond. I knew the first time I made love to you. Not the first time we had sex, but that very first time, when we came together, and I was loving you. You know when. I knew it happened then and I waited for you to say something. Your dragon grew bright and hot. Glowing. I saw him. I felt him. He didn’t hide from me because he knew I was your other half. He would never have allowed such a thing to happen with another man.”

There was a bite to his voice that made her wince. They walked for a few steps, the pace slow, as if they were two lovers strolling around the lake together. She wore a warm coat, long, with weapons hidden in the inside lining where there were loops to hold them. The hood was warm and covered the back of her neck, the lining made of some material Isai had come up with to shield her from any weapon should they be attacked. She had reinforced that armor with a protection spell.

“Why do you insist on casting me in the worst possible light, Julija?”

Her heart twisted and squeezed down hard. Was there hurt in his voice? “Isai, I don’t do that. My insecurities have nothing to do with you. You’re like this larger-than-life hero who has come into my life and swept me off my feet. You’re perfect, other than that spanking thing.” She tried to insert a little humor, but it fell flat. She wasn’t feeling humorous. She wanted to cry for herself. For him. For the knowledge that they weren’t going to survive this deadly task.

“Everything seems so fated. Like we have no choices. I knew when we talked purity that innocence was involved and, low and behold, I believe absolutely that I’m pregnant. There is an innocent life growing inside me. It hasn’t had time to even develop and yet I’m taking it into a conflict that we have little chance of living through. More, I will use my blood, our blood, the blood of my unborn child in an attempt to destroy a book that is so vile that I would never want my child on the same continent with it.” She had known the moment she realized she was pregnant that it would be a combination of their blood, the child’s, hers and Isai’s. It was fated. None of them had a way out.

“This is not so. We could turn our backs on our duty.”

“You would never do that.” She tried not to sound bitter.

“Neither would you.”

He turned her to face him, to stand directly in front of him. She realized that tears were running down her face when he brushed at them with his hands.

“Julija, why wouldn’t you tell me of your fears instead of jealously guarding them, keeping them from your lifemate? I am your partner. When you are afraid, when you have these kinds of worries, who better to share them with?”

She’d been alone so long, holding things to herself, she almost didn’t know how to reach out and share with him. This? This was huge. She wrapped both arms around her body, trying to shield her child. “I don’t want this for our child. I don’t want either of us to die here. We haven’t had a chance at a life together. We have to do this and even if we didn’t, Barnabas and Anatolie won’t ever let me leave.”

“Anatolie might, but you are correct: Barnabas is not going to leave you alone. I know you fear his power, Julija, and you have every reason to do so. I believe you are a match for Anatolie. Barnabas, no. But together, you and me, I believe we are. I feel very strongly about that. Now we have a third. A triangle of power.”

“I don’t want our child to have been conceived because we need him or her to complete this task. It feels like I did that. Worse, we haven’t been together five

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