“Good.” I couldn’t stop myself from saying it. The words just slipped past my tongue.
Heath shivered again and touched me with a little more intention, his hands sliding up my sides to my pecs and then back down. I kissed him again, open-mouthed and filthy as I pinned him to the door. Then I slid my hands from his hips to his body, under the hem of his shirt and up, up, up, rucking the fabric up as I went until it was beneath his arms. Under my hands, his skin was deliciously smooth, his body firm with toned muscle but still so small and narrow. I broke the kiss to admire the view.
God, his body was perfect. Slim and pale and smooth all over. I skated my hand from his hip across his abs to his chest, and flattened my palm over his perfectly small rosy pink nipples, which hardened rapidly under my hand. He inhaled sharply.
“Gorgeous,” I murmured.
Heath swallowed hard. He stilled suddenly, and he dropped his hands off my body to hang limp at his sides. He ducked his chin down as I touched him.
It was like a switch had flipped. Suddenly he wasn’t pressing back up into my touch, or touching me—or even looking like he wanted me at all. Concern doused my arousal like a freezing cold water. I pulled my hands away and rested one hand on his hip, on his pants, not his skin. “What is it?”
Heath drew his lower lip in between his teeth. “Sorry, it’s—it’s fine. It’s nothing.”
“It’s clearly not nothing,” I said. The last thing I wanted was for him to be uncomfortable again—because of me, again. Not after things had finally started to ease between us. I wasn’t about to let Heath withdraw into his shell again.
“Come on.” I placed my forefinger under his chin and tilted his face up. I met his eyes. “Tell me the truth.”
Heath swallowed again. His lips parted.
The effect my commands had on him was intoxicating. It was like I could see the worries slip from his mind as he recentered on this moment, and onto me. God, I wanted to push that further. But now wasn’t the time. We needed to communicate about this—especially if it was going to go in the direction I wanted it to.
“I—I don’t really know what I’m doing,” he managed to say. The blush was so deep now. “I’ve never—done this.”
“Done what?” I asked, biting my tongue on a pet name. Not yet.
I assumed he meant he wasn’t experienced with taking orders, and I didn’t want anything I said to make him more uncomfortable. It affected him so obviously—but if he didn’t know that about himself, I understood how it could be jarring. If he wanted to talk about it now, we’d talk about it now.
“Anything,” Heath admitted. “I mean. This is the furthest I’ve… gone. With anyone.”
He cringed at his own words, turning his head like he wanted to move away from me.
I dropped my hand off his hip. “You’re a virgin.”
Fuck. I’d just fucking—attacked him, basically, so lost in my own desires that I hadn’t even considered he might not be ready for that. Or for anything besides a kiss. We hadn’t even talked about this—whatever it was. I just went for it, like an inexperienced Dom who was only thinking about how good it would feel.
God, I was really an asshole. I took a step back to give him some breathing room.
Heath tugged his shirt down then wrapped his arms around himself. He looked so small, and vulnerable, and I was gripped by the sudden desire to cover his body with my own again. To protect him somehow. But it was my fault he felt the way he did—the last thing he needed was for me to decide what he needed.
I grimaced. How could I have been so impulsive and irresponsible? I wanted him to feel safe with me. And I’d pushed him too far. What a rookie move.
“I shouldn’t have done that,” I said when Heath remained silent, the unhappiness clear in my voice. “I—I’ll give you some space. And it won’t happen again.”
Heath’s face crumpled. My heart sank. I did that to him. I’d violated him, and now he was pulling away from like I’d hurt him. Because I had.
Fuck. He deserved space, and privacy right now, not my dumb old face in his business. I cursed under my breath and left his bedroom, pulling his