having so many people in one place,” Cristian argues.
“At this point, it might make it easier for us. They have to come to arm themselves anyway. Make the calls.”
Approaching the house, the gates are locked, but the guards appear from everywhere as Cristian jumps out and plugs in the code.
“At least you’ve held down your estate.”
I smile at Mila, but even I can feel it doesn’t reach my eyes.
Cristian doesn’t jump back in the car, so we set off for the house. It pleases me to see there are still so many men on lookout.
Limping inside, I dig out the bottle of pills Lila gave me and pop two more into my mouth.
“What do you want me to do, Mila?” Trey inquires, coming up behind us.
“Get some sleep. You’re no good to me if you’re not rested up.”
After he disappears, I keep hold of her hand as I slowly and painfully lead her to my room. Once inside, I sigh with relief when I close the door, trapping us in and away from the world.
There’s no awkwardness this time. She strips down to her underwear and climbs under the sheets.
As thankful as I was for the clean pants, I’m glad to shove them down my legs and step out of them. I climb in beside her, yet as tired as I know she is, her eyes are wide, staring straight at me.
“Sometimes I believe I can have it all, but most times, reality reminds me it’s not possible.”
“That’s funny. Reality reminds me I can have anything I wish for.”
“You don’t have to be so arrogant.”
“You forget, Mila. Even though we want a different Vita than our forefathers, we’re still who we are. And if we want something that seems impossible, it’s only a case of fighting until it’s ours. We’ve been fighting each other and for each other for so many years, it’s time we fight for us. We’re allowed to find our own slice of happiness.”
“You’re right. I’m tired of fighting against you. I want you. I want us.”
“Then you’ve got me, all of me, for always.”
Chapter Forty
Jamila
My eyes flutter open to a commotion outside. No, that’s not right. Voices, deep voices, talking and barking out orders. I don’t sense danger coming for us, but it does feel late in the day, and my eyes are sore from fatigue.
Rolling over, the sheets soft against my skin, I find Raphael gone, the sheets on his side cold.
I sit up, clutching the sheets to my chest and look at the fallen angel painting, feeling the same way looking at it now as I did the first time I saw it. Its power consumes me, reminding me of Raphael. I wasn’t lying when I said I trusted him, because I do, especially when it comes to defeating the DiMarco’s. But when it comes to my heart, I’m not so sure. The pull is as strong as ever, but this time, I’m not as easily willing to fall. Not yet, anyway. I want him, and I’m not going to stay away from him, but the little voice in the back of my mind won’t go away, telling me that he’s going to crush my heart again.
Hearing a growl coming from the bathroom, I slip out of bed, drag on my clothes, and head inside to find Raphael perched on the edge of the clawfoot tub, tending to his wound.
“Lila did well. I don’t think it will scar too badly.”
“I’m glad.” Going over to him, I sit beside him as he rewraps his thigh. “I’ve been thinking. When we leave this room, we have to be professional. You can’t be holding my hand.”
He snorts as he ties off the bandage. It’s not as neat as Lila’s work, but it’ll do the job just the same. When he’s finished, he turns to me, forgetting all about his leg.
“Yeah, that’s not going to happen. I’m not wasting a single second when it comes to us.” Lifting his hand, he cups my cheek in his large hand, and I can’t help but lean into his touch. “I’m not holding back. If I want to hold your hand, I will. If I want to kiss you, I will. And if I want the world to hear I love you, I’ll yell it loud and fucking clear.”
His words have always been able to knock me over when he declares how he feels for me, but the little voice is growing louder. Trying to ignore it, at least for a