Damaged Love - Jaxson Kidman Page 0,48

that’s what I had wanted to do all along.

To go see him.

Or maybe not.

As I got closer to the house, I realized he was standing out on the deck.

I saw the glow of his cigarette.

He wasn’t alone either.

There were two other figures with him.

Noah. Xavier.

I quickly dug my heels into the sand and stopped myself.

I knew they could see me.

Because I could see them.

I didn’t say a word.

They didn’t say a word.

Yet we were all staring at each other.

I started to take a step when I heard voices.

They weren’t coming from in front of or behind me.

They were coming from the deck. From Easton’s beach house.

The sliding door opened and then shut.

Who emerged?

Three girls.

I couldn’t see who they were, but their bouncy voices instantly pissed me off.

They hurried up to the guys and were all over them.

Some girl threw her arms around Noah’s neck. He turned his head and she kissed his cheek.

Another girl turned and leaned into Easton.

He looked at her, smiled and smoked his cigarette.

The third girl wrapped her arms around Xavier’s body but he didn’t look back at her.

He kept looking at me.

This was all part of their game.

Or maybe this was me catching them in the truth.

The truth that they wanted nothing to do with me. That they were faking it near me just to keep me close, to make sure I still had no memory of the accident.

I wasn’t going to stand there and watch this bullshit happen.

In a way, it just confirmed that my decision to tease and hold back was smart.

They wanted to go fuck other girls, that was their thing to do.

We weren’t together.

Everything was a complete lie.

So be it.

I turned and started to run.

I was kind of drunk. The sand was uneven. It was hard to run.

My feet and legs hurt.

I just kept running though.

All the way back to my mother’s beach house.

Gia was still sitting on the steps.

Smiling at me.

I wasn’t smiling though.

I felt like crying.

Which I didn’t like at all.

What the hell was I going to cry about?

Because Noah, Easton, and Xavier had other girls in their lives?

Why did it matter?

It was so stupid.

None of this was real to begin with…

“How was your run?” Gia asked.

“You couldn’t catch me, huh?” I asked.

She laughed. “Yeah, okay. You can think that all you want. Hey, are you okay? You look upset.”

“Just a little… I don’t know. I shouldn’t have went for a run while drunk.”

“Dizzy and sick?”

“A little,” I said.

I slowly plopped down to the sand and let out a sigh.

“You’re nervous, aren’t you?” Gia asked.

“About?”

“You’re taking off tomorrow,” she said. “For the ball…”

“I know,” I said. “No big deal.”

“Yes, it is a big deal. A really big deal.”

“It’s really not, Gia. Seriously. They’re not who I think they are. I’m not who they think I am. It’ll all come crashing down eventually. That’s how this is supposed to go. I’m going to get hurt. But as long as they get hurt too, I’m good with it.”

“That’s kind of dark, Winter.”

“No… it’s something I’ve been avoiding for a while now.”

“Which is what?”

“The truth.”

Chapter 17

desires in a bag

There were a lot of things I should and shouldn’t have been doing.

The list could go on and on for each side.

I put myself in that position, and I was able to sleep comfortably knowing that.

The real reason I tossed and turned all night was what I had seen.

Noah, Easton, and Xavier with those other girls.

What did I actually think was going to happen? That they were going to be honest and good guys? It was getting old to have to keep mentally slapping myself as a reminder of what they had done to me.

I tried to take comfort that they had shown their true colors at a perfect time. Let them have their beach house party. Let them have fun. Let them have their other girls. Let them do whatever they wanted.

They weren’t the only ones with something on the side.

Right?

I swallowed hard and bit my lip.

I looked at my phone and it was close to two in the morning.

My day was already planned out and kind of done.

Meaning… I knew what I had to do and what time it had to be completed by. That meant some more work for BFH. Checking in and up with Gia. Packing some stuff. Making sure my mother was going to be okay for a couple days. Think. Eat. And then wait for the guys to show up.

There was a small fluttering of excitement in my stomach.