Cruz (Dark and Dirty Sinners' MC #5) - Serena Akeroyd Page 0,132
and she wrapped her arms around her waist. “I was sitting with Bear today before the service and it was, Christ, it’s just so hard seeing him like that.”
I grimaced. “Tell me about it.”
“I can’t believe he’s…” She shook her head. “It’s tragic. I know he’s getting older and everything, but he’s still so fucking vital, you know?”
I cast her a look. “He hasn’t been back to West Orange for years, Giulia. I haven’t seen him in at least three. You’re remembering him from when you were a kid. He’s changed a lot since—”
She swallowed. “No, that’s just it. I’ve seen him more recently.”
Pouting, I demanded, “When? I always hang out with Bear when he comes back. I miss the old fucker,” I finished sadly, because I did. Though I’d never liked what he stood for, never appreciated the MC and its MO, the man himself was pretty cool. And hearing his war stories was fascinating. He’d served at the tail end of the Vietnam War, and the shit he’d seen had always caught my attention.
“You know, I never told anyone this before…”
Curiosity hit me. “Told anyone what?”
“That night, when Lancaster attacked me at the bar.” She bit her lip, and I realized she looked anguished. I wouldn’t put it past her to start wringing her hands together. As it was, Giulia, the ice queen and chief psychopath-handler, looked to be on the brink of fucking tears. “I didn’t kill him.”
As the breath whooshed out of her lungs, I blinked at her. “Huh?”
“God, you’ve no idea how long I’ve been keeping that in.” She pressed a hand to her chest, like she’d been holding a solid mass in place, and now with her admission, the weight had gone.
I knew how that felt, but still, she’d stunned the shit out of me. “Keeping what in?” I repeated a little dumbly.
“That I didn’t kill Luke Lancaster. Bear did.”
“Bear did.” I gaped at her. “You're joking, right?”
“I’m not. I don’t know where the hell he came from, and to be honest, I thought it was a fucking dream when salvation came walking through the door—then he killed him, and reality hit with a bang.” She raised a shaking hand to her mouth, then pressed her pointer finger to her lips in the universal sign of ‘silence.’ “He told me to keep it quiet. So I did.”
“Christ.” A sigh gusted from me. “What the hell was his game?”
“I don’t know.”
“You didn’t tell Nyx?”
“Bear saved me from that bastard, Indy. I wasn’t about to repay that by letting him down. Especially when we found out what a monster he was. I could have been like the girls. He was trying to kidnap me, I know it. He didn't just want to rape me, he wanted to take me.” She gulped. “B-But what if Bear's so badly injured because of me? What if this attack is related to the Lancasters?”
“Oh, sweetheart, of course it isn’t because of you. Hell, you know the shit the Sinners get mixed up in. It’s a wonder we don’t deal with this kind of crap every-damn-day of the week.” I moved over to her and tugged her into a hug. When she burrowed into my arms, it felt like she was vibrating with tension, and I realized she’d been carrying around that guilt for a long ass time. “The Lancasters aren’t even a threat anymore, are they?”
“The Sinners got involved with this craziness because of me. How aren’t I to blame?”
Anger hit me, and I pulled back so I could grab her by the shoulders and, baby or not, I shook her a little. A bit too hard, but enough for her to glare at me which was what I needed. “You asked that bastard to assault you?”
Her jaw clenched. “No.”
“Did you ask him to try to—”
“You know I didn’t,” she snarled, pulling away. “I know what you’re trying to do. But it doesn’t stop the cause and effect, does it? Before me, the club hadn’t even heard of the fucking Lancasters.”
“And after you, they do, and look at what you’ve done. If you’re to blame for all of this, then Link has met his Old Lady because of you, and Maverick, who was a fucking lost cause thanks to goddamn Uncle Sam, has Ghost.” I shook my head. “I have no idea what the Sinners are doing, but I know the guys well enough to figure out that if they saved Ghost and—”