Cruel Kisses (It's Just High School #2) - Thandiwe Mpofu Page 0,29
night. You never cared for him, you never touched him or comforted him. You never fed him or looked after him. You always had someone else do it. You never tucked him in bed like you did with Liam and me. You never cared if he ate or was okay. You never came to the hospital when he was sick…” I mutter, my mind scrambling to piece together the scattered fragments of my memory. “You hated the very existence of him.”
“Fuck,” Cole mutters, now pacing a hole in the floor.
“Julian,” Mom starts with a gasp, tears running down her cheeks, her eyes wide and pleading for something that makes the inferno of anger in me even hotter. “I was only twenty-two when Aiden…”
“You fucking did it?” Liam shouts. Courtney gasps, clutching her pearls, looking distressed and out of her mind but still guilty as hell. How could she do that?
“Liam, I was young and…”
“And what?” Liam shouts, cutting her off. “You were young and what? The worst human on earth? Torturing a child? Jesus.”
There’s a low buzzing sound coming from somewhere, like the one when something is about to blow up. I hear it getting louder with each breath I take as old memories resurface with a vengeance.
I remember the way never wanted to be touched, except when dad was there.
Dad…
I always wondered why Aiden never resented the asshole for not being there for him. But then Aiden was better than me. He didn’t hate anyone, he was the very best of this fucked-up family, pure at heart, authentic with his feelings and when it came to Dad, he loved him with his whole heart even though I was silently hating the bastard.
But now this? He ignored Aiden… just to appease my hateful mother?
“Please,” I hear her cry, her voice a low rasp that sends chills running down my back.
I have no idea who she’s begging, but the violence I feel in my body right now… no, I need to get out of here.
I turn to leave but a hand on my arm stops me.
“Julian, you need to understand. I was young—”
“What the fuck can I understand, huh?” I snap, turning around to look at her with a dead stare so cold she jumps back, her face falling.
“Julian…”
“No, I understand perfectly clear what you did. I understand that you hurt people. You hurt my brother. You were the face of his terrors and you… you took his voice…”
“I never meant to hurt him.”
“But not only that, you hurt Mia! You have so much hate in you is it any wonder that I’m like this?”
I hate that my voice breaks at the end.
I hate that I didn’t push Aiden to tell me what was going on.
I hate that years went by without actually knowing the dark, inhumane things that were happening in this house.
I hate myself for not doing anything about it all.
“Oh God,” Courtney whimpers, snot running down her nose, mixing with tears and the fake remorse on her face. “I didn’t know any better.”
Yeah, she did. She knew exactly what she was doing.
“You tortured him!” I shout. “You are my fucking mother and you tortured my brother. Why? Because he was different? Because he wasn’t yours?”
“Because your father’s attention was always on him,” she confesses the words in a low tone but everyone hears her and I almost reel back like she just slapped me.
“Jesus,” Liam gasps. “You beat him up, left him alone in the dark then starved him, all because your husband didn’t give two shits about you?”
My God.
Everything’s so fucked up that even Cole is crouched on the floor, unable to stand any more, his hands on his head, a faraway look in his eyes.
Can you blame him? What the fuck do you do with this? Where do you go from here?
How did I not see this before?
You didn’t see it? Or you refuse to believe it?
“Liam,” Mom whispers. “I didn’t know any better…”
It feels like the ground is shaking under me, threatening to topple me at any second.
“No,” he mutters, cutting her off. “I don’t want to hear another word coming from you.”
“Liam, baby, please…”
Liam shakes his head, tears running down his face, pain contorting his face as he looks at the ceiling, then he looks around the room then stops on me, his gaze holding mine.
I see the moment the confusion clears as he finally gives in to the turmoil that’s ravaging his insides like it’s destroying me.