Crazy In Love (Secrets of Suburbia #3) - Ivy Smoak Page 0,27
to? This lady was hella insane. She wanted everyone to be cheating on everyone. Now I was just suspicious of her. Maybe she was sleeping with my husband too. I wouldn't put it past him. "No. He didn't choose not to come home. He's missing." It was very important to my narrative that my neighbors thought my husband still loved me. I didn't want to be the jilted murderous wife. I just wanted to be the murderous wife. Charlotte didn't need to know that Detective Torres thought he'd run away with his mistress. That could be my little secret.
Her eyes grew round. "Missing?"
"Yes." I lowered my voice. "I think he may have been kidnapped." Okay, maybe that was a bit much. Especially since I was the only one that knew that for sure. But I was enjoying her fake sympathy.
"Oh, dear." She reached out and touched my arm to continue whatever charade she was playing.
Snuggle Muffins growled.
Charlotte immediately removed her hand from me as we both stared down at my dog.
He could sense that Charlotte was bad news too. Such a good boy. "Well, I should probably go keep calling family and friends to see if anyone's heard anything." I did that sniffling thing I was mastering.
"Is there anything I can do to help?" she asked.
Did she not take the hint? She was neither family nor friend. "You've already done too much. The lasagna smells divine." Although, I had no idea why she made me something she'd never eat. Maybe she was just trying to fatten me up with carbs. "Actually, you know what? Could you maybe ask around the neighborhood? See if anyone knows something we could tell Detective Torres."
"I'd be happy to."
Of course you would.
"And you're sure you don't need anything else? If you want to talk...I'm here for you. I could come in and..."
"No." I cleared my throat. "I really just need to be alone." I wiped under my eyes even though there weren't any tears.
"I understand. Stay strong. The cops will find him. This neighborhood's already been through enough."
She was referring to Violet Clark and Adeline Bell. And the funny thing was that she had no idea that I idolized them. They had life right. They took justice into their own hands. I was going to be one of them. The three badass suburban housewives that went down in history. I just needed to get my answers first. A confession that my husband was cheating. And access to my money again. Then I'd be on the run too. "Absolutely," I said. "I'll see you later."
Charlotte was waiting for me to go back into my house.
And I was waiting for her to leave my front porch. If I opened the door she might be able to hear screaming. "Bye," I said, hoping it didn't sound rude.
"Okay. Just call if you need anything. And don't forget that lasagna."
Right. I lifted it up and smiled.
She smiled back. "And if you need any help decorating for the annual Christmas light competition, let me know."
Did she not understand that I'd retired from being a perfect suburban housewife? "Will do." You're dismissed.
She finally retreated.
I let out the breath I'd been holding. Soon my whole neighborhood would know my husband was "missing." Everyone would be talking about me. When Charlotte was well out of earshot, I opened the front door. I was expecting to hear yelling, but it was quiet. Snuggle Muffins trotted after me back into the house.
"You know, you were supposed to stay in the kitchen." I looked down at him.
He sighed.
"But you were right to growl. She's a meanie. Don't be fooled by the lasagna." I lifted it up. "Dirty housewife games."
I swore Snuggle Muffins nodded.
"Okay, let's go get wasted. Well, not you. And not me either. Loose lips sink ships. And my ship isn't going down. My husband's is going down. Burn baby burn."
Snuggle Muffins sighed.
Why am I talking to a dog?
***
"Fa la la la la, I have your drink." I set down the tray and lifted up the bottle of champagne my husband and I had been saving for a special occasion. Today felt special to me.
He stayed silent as I poured the champagne into the flutes we'd used on our wedding day. What he didn't know was that the bottle was only half filled with champagne. I was going for drunk. Not a mild buzz. It was half vodka now. And a splash of orange juice to cover the flavor.