Court Out - By Elle Wynne Page 0,7
still thinks I’ll be in the retro monstrosity, so I’m quite looking forward to the look on his face as I glide down the aisle looking elegant and poised.
“What’s next on your to do list?”
“Well, I’ve found a man in London who’ll rent me some sky blue butterflies to release outside the church. They’ll go perfectly with my colour scheme!”
“Butterflies?” I falter, “But surely you’ll need quite a few of those to make an impact? Plus, what if it’s raining?”
“Oh, that’s not a problem, he has two hundred Adonis Blue that we can have. If it rains, I just won’t bother releasing them.”
“But surely you’ll still have to pay for them?”
“Of course, but think how amazing they’ll look if I can pull it off. They’re totally worth the cost and their owner is included in the price to sort them out after.”
“I should hope so, I thought for a nasty minute you were going to say you’re having customised butterfly nets made so that the guests can retrieve them for you.”
A wild look flashes across her eyes.
“Lauren, that’s a marvel-”
“No! No! No! That’s not a good idea at all Serena, it’s a terrible one. Anyway, I thought you’re under strict orders to cut back on the budget, not increase it?”
She gives a heavy sigh and rolls her eyes.
“Ewan needs to chill out. You only get married once and given that I earn more than him anyway he has no cause to tell me what I can or can’t spend my money on.”
“Don’t you mean ‘our’ money?” I ask cautiously.
This is a touchy subject with Serena as whilst she is more than happy to put all of their earnings into a single joint account, she has never let Ewan forget that all is not equal.
If it wasn’t for the fact that she spends far more than she puts in I might consider sympathising with her, but as Ewan has to pay his share of the bills plus Serena’s monthly House of Fraser card bill and cover any cash shortfalls, my alliance remains firmly, but silently, with him.
Serena’s vent continues.
“He is such a miser. He never shuts up about how much money I’m spending on the wedding. Doesn’t he realise that it’s his big day too? I wish he’d get a proper job instead of schlepping off to work at that awful call centre everyday wearing that cheap looking uniform. It’s so embarrassing when I have to introduce him to colleagues and explain that he cold-calls people for a living. God, imagine making minimum wage being hung up on two hundred times a day!”
“Hey!” I squawk, “I used to work in a call centre too remember, when I was at uni. Don’t knock it. You may think your powers of advocacy as a barrister are second to none, but anyone who can get someone to buy something blind over the phone is a master of persuasion if you ask me!”
She pauses and considers her options whilst taking a long drink from her glass.
“Yeah, whatever, but it wouldn’t hurt him to be more ambitious, you know, make more of himself. He has a degree for Christ sakes! I’d love to be taken on surprise luxury holidays, or treated to a champagne dinner once in a while. It’s not fair.”
“Have you lost the plot? It’s called a honeymoon!” I retort incredulously.
I’m getting quite annoyed at this point as for reasons best known to her, Serena is determined to interpret her whole relationship as ‘glass half empty’ at the moment. Given what she is holding, the irony is not lost on me.
“Yeah, well if I find out that we’re going on a cheapie budget job then the honeymoon may be over quicker than the wedding.”
I bite my tongue this time and pour us some more wine. How have we managed to get through that much of the bottle already? As I steel myself to resume the subject of further Ewan bashing, it appears I am no longer the focus of Serena’s attention. Neither for that matter is Ewan.
Serena is looking over my shoulder to a group of people that have just managed to squeeze into the bar and are making their way to the seats by the window. There are six of them, three men and two women. Initially, I don’t recognise any of them, but then a tall, very thin black woman in a tight navy suit and cheap looking red shoes comes into view. As she runs her hand through her straight, bobbed