enough to sleep in a guest bedroom that night. She felt terribly guilty about that after the fact.
A week after the argument, Jack was still emotionally distant. Caroline knew he was considering what she said, not wanting to believe it. But he’d felt that way ever since the convention. It would take a lot for him to admit that she was right, not because he didn’t want to concede the point but because he would be apprehensive as to what it would mean for the future of the nation. At times Caroline thought she was being overly dramatic, but she was convinced that her instincts were correct. She just had to find the proof.
She sat at her desk, rubbing her forehead. Her office was down the hall from Jack’s. He’d wanted it that way; no one had really confirmed it, but she had taken on the role of an unofficial policy advisor and was called in to staff meetings from time to time. This didn’t seem to bother anyone aside from the lieutenant governor, who appeared to think that his role was diminished. Which was true, but Jack and Caroline were much too nice to say it to his face. The LG knew what he was. He and Caroline were both glorified figureheads. Placeholders. Window dressing. No need to fool anyone about it. The only major difference between them: he’d actually been on the ballot.
Fifty feet separated their office spaces, but Caroline hadn’t seen Jack all day. She thought about picking up the phone but didn’t. She missed him. They weren’t fighting, not really, but she missed him desperately. There were times when she’d be lying in bed next to him, listening to him breathe, wishing she could get closer to him, missing him even though he was right there. Jack was right; she wasn’t codependent. But she’d still come to depend on him more than anyone else, and that scared the shit out of her.
She told herself that she should go upstairs, eat some dinner, do something with the rest of her evening. She was tempted to go see him but wasn’t sure what to say. They’d slept together that morning and Jack had been so tender, so kind, so loving…but then afterward he showered quickly, got dressed, and left the bedroom without saying a word. She wondered what he was thinking. Caroline impulsively picked up the phone and dialed his extension instead of walking down the hall, realizing her cowardice.
Jack picked up on the first ring. “Hey, baby,” he said.
“Are you mad at me?”
He laughed. “Why would you think that?”
“You haven’t spoken to me all day.”
“I’ve been doing chief executive stuff, sweetheart. I have responsibilities, you know.”
He tried to sound light. She didn’t buy it. “That’s never been a problem before.”
“Why didn’t you walk down the hall to tell me this?”
“I didn’t – I thought you might be busy.”
“I am. But I’m never too busy to talk to you. I didn’t realize I hadn’t checked in on you today.” He sighed audibly. “I’m sorry.”
“I don’t expect you to check in on me. It’s probably silly for me to be upset just because I haven’t seen you in a few hours,” Caroline said. “You’re the governor. You have shit to do. I’ll let you get back to work.”
“Caroline, I’ve been sitting at my desk the last hour, pretending to work and thinking about you. I thought maybe you were avoiding me, not the other way around. I had no idea you were still downstairs. Have you eaten yet?”
“No.”
“Have you eaten at all today?”
“I had lunch.”
“Are you hungry?”
Her stomach had growled a couple of times but she still didn’t feel like eating. “Not really.”
Jack’s voice softened. “I’m sorry that you thought I was mad at you. I swear I’m not. I’m-”
He sounded hesitant. “What?” she asked.
“Why don’t you come over here so we can talk?”
“Okay.” Caroline hung up the phone and ran down the hall into his office. The door was open and she shut it behind her. One could never be too careful.
Jack gave her a knowing smile. “That was quick.”
“Did you want me to linger over the decision?”
“No. Come on over to the couch and we’ll talk. I need a break anyway.” They sat down and he put his arm around her. “What’s really bothering you, sweetheart?”
“You were kind of brusque this morning,” she said. “After we…you left and didn’t say anything.”
“You don’t think me moaning your name into your ear was worth noting?”