Confessions from the Quilting Circle - Maisey Yates Page 0,95
this.
So long since she’d allowed herself to feel it, and she hadn’t even let herself acknowledge how much she missed it.
She’d just pushed it away, brushed it to the back of a cupboard to be dealt with later, because there were too many big things in her life that needed doing. Needed mending and caring and loving.
And this hadn’t mattered. She hadn’t let it.
She’d forgotten it, and she’d done it on purpose.
Now that cupboard had been pushed on its end and this had spilled out before she was ready and maybe it was all the better for it.
Because for her, sex had always been linked with love, with intimacy. And they didn’t have that. But they had chemistry.
And it was real.
Terrifying.
Wonderful.
She’d never known this before. The heat that could exist between two people built with nothing more than their desire.
Everywhere he put his hands, it was like fire. Desire that she hadn’t realized still existed in her. And everywhere she put her hands on him...
Learning the landscape of a new male body was intense, so bright and sharp and brilliant. She wanted to memorize the moment, him, every dip and ripple in his muscles, the texture of his skin.
She wanted to live in the moment, this moment, for as long as she possibly could. Because everything felt so good.
And she wasn’t sad.
She kissed his face, his chest, his abs, and he turned her over onto her back, strong hands pinning her to the mattress as he made good on his promise, and kissed her everywhere.
As he wedged apart her legs with his broad shoulders and pleasured her with his mouth until she shattered.
Until she was nothing more than a scattering of bright, brilliant pieces that she didn’t even want put back together.
And when he surged inside of her, his face filled her vision. And his body was so deep in hers that she didn’t know where she ended and began anymore.
Somehow it was sacred. A prayer in the dark stillness of the bedroom, even though it shouldn’t have been. A vow made with their bodies. That he’d give her pleasure if nothing else. That his strong arms would hold her together even while she was afraid she was going to fly apart.
She was so acutely aware that it was him. It hit her then that she hadn’t been afraid, not for one moment, that she wouldn’t be. That she would wish it was Jacob, or have difficulty not fantasizing about him.
No, this had been different. He had been different, from the very first kiss. And it had been needed. Necessary. A gift and a blessing.
Adam, with nothing between them, not so much as a breath, and certainly not a counter.
And he drove home that point.
Over and over again, until she shattered in his arms, and he broke apart right after, her name on his breath, on a kiss that she took for herself.
When it was over, she lay next to him for a moment. Her body was bare, pressed against his. Lying next to him in bed like this felt as intimate as him being in her, and she couldn’t figure out why.
She studied the lines of his face, all the tension gone now. His arms were slung over his head, the blankets barely covering his beautiful body. She wanted more time. But she couldn’t stay out all night. Emma and Anna thought that she was out with Mark and...
She really had to go home. She couldn’t stay here.
She couldn’t sleep in his bed. That was... A faint glimmer caught her eye, and she realized that it was her wedding ring. She was still wearing it. She had worn it on her date. She had worn it to bed with another man. She couldn’t sleep in the same bed as another man while she still had this ring on her finger.
Pain crowded her thoughts, her chest, her heart.
Hannah’s words roared back to her.
How she’d been here with Adam while Jacob was dying...
Kissing him had been so easy. So easy to let him lean forward and close that distance between them. Like part of her had been waiting to do it for years. Like a secret piece of her had wanted that mouth on hers for far longer than she should have.
“I have to go,” she said.
He mumbled something, then his eyes open slowly. “Why?”
“Because I can’t be gone all night. People will... You know. People will talk.”
She hadn’t cared about anyone else this whole time. Only herself.