with my best friend mess. And quietly, the idea of going on a date with Zed had my stomach all aflutter with excitement.
20
"It's not a fucking date, you stupid twit," I muttered at myself in the mirror as I touched up my winged eyeliner. "It's fucking business. Not a date."
And yet, that message seemed impossible to get through to the brainless butterflies causing havoc in my belly. Maybe just because I'd grown so used to having either Lucas or Cass around as a buffer between Zed and I? The times we were alone, they were clearly defined business situations, but checking in on the Reapers was blurring the lines. Scruffy Murphy's wasn't one of our clubs, and I had no real obligation to insert myself in Reaper politics. It was a favor to Cass, and now that Zed had put it in my head that it could be a date, I couldn't seem to shake it off.
I was so fucking pathetic. Whispering a few more curses at myself, I swiped on a coat of my favorite smudge-proof red lipstick, then called it done. I wore a tiny black dress that just barely covered my ass and showed off a whole lot of leg. Over the dress I wore my black leather gun holster and knife harness. They crisscrossed my chest and wrapped around my waist in a sexy-as-hell BDSM sort of way. Except functional, for holding my weapons.
My red-soled heels were tall—of course—and a thin strap wrapped around each of my ankles like little ankle cuffs.
I'd tied my hair up in a high ponytail, the softly curled length brushing my bare back, and I paused briefly before leaving my room to carefully slide a stiletto blade into my hair. One could never be too heavily armed when strolling into a potentially hostile environment. Not to mention Chase was still out there somewhere, and he'd be undoubtedly looking for revenge for those knockout drugs.
"Fuck me dead," Zed groaned when I left my room and found him leaning against the wall opposite, waiting for me. "You're actually trying to kill me now, aren't you? This isn't fair."
I couldn't help the wide smile that lit up my face at his reaction. I'd be lying if I hadn't dressed with Zed on my mind the whole time.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I lied. "This is my usual business attire."
Zed scoffed a laugh, his heated gaze running down the exposed length of my legs as he shook his head. "Bullshit," he accused in a whisper. "This is definitely a date now."
"Have you heard anything from Archer?" I asked, changing the subject as we headed downstairs. "Seph is still not responding to me. She currently hates me for murdering Cass."
Zed's hand rested on the small of my back as we made our way through to the garage, and it took all my strength not to spin around and pounce on him. I badly should have flicked my own bean in the shower to relieve some tension, but apparently, I loved the torture.
"Maybe it's time you told Seph the truth," Zed suggested, not for the first time. "She's eighteen now; surely she's old enough to hear the whole story."
I snorted a bitter laugh. "You think Seph can keep a secret as important as Cass being alive? No. Sorry, just no. I'd rather have her hating me for something I didn't do than pander to her sense of importance and potentially get Cass killed for real."
Zed sighed, opening the passenger door to his Ferrari for me. His Audi was back in the garage, too, having come back from the body shop a day earlier. The scratch Chase had left was totally gone. "Yeah, fair point," he admitted. He closed my door for me, then circled around to his own side. "I still think she needs to know the rest, though. About Chase, certainly. Maybe if she understands the danger, she'll quit being a pain about all the protection."
I grimaced. He was right, and I knew it. But selfishly, I didn't want my little sister to know the truth. I hated the idea of admitting everything I'd gone through with Chase when I was a teenager. Telling her my whole sordid tale would mean admitting just how much I let him get away with, how much abuse I let him dish out, and all because I stupidly believed I loved him. Or, in the later days, because I was just too weak, too broken to resist. My