Christmas Tales - Brandon Witt Page 0,11

abruptly. I was in a stranger’s house. A naked stranger. Who seemed to either be flirting with me or had possibly offered me sex. Twice.

In less than thirty seconds, Raymond was back. Way before I had time to figure out what the hell I was doing. He was in mid-process of slipping into a tie-dyed robe that looked part dressing gown, part kimono. I was fairly certain he hesitated a moment longer than necessary, letting me see his cock once more, before he pulled the halves together and cinched the tie at his waist. His smile returned. He was handsome. Very. Eyebrows a little too bushy, but handsome.

“Nice of you to drop by. I’d been meaning to do so myself. I was going to bring over a batch of my magic brownies, but I’ve been too busy cleaning out the place. My uncle was a bit of a hoarder, and I can’t bring myself to bake until everything is clean. So, sorry. I wasn’t trying to be rude. I’ll bring you the good stuff in a few days.” He winked.

“Magic brownies?” I couldn’t figure out what to focus on. Apparently brownies won.

He gave me a look. “You don’t know what magic brownies are? I know I might be a bit older than you, but come on, dude. You’ve got to know what—”

I cut him off. “Yeah, I know what magic brownies are. I don’t do drugs.”

His eyes narrowed, but his grin never wavered. “Well, then. I’ll make you a boring batch alongside the good ones.” He cleared his throat. “Can I get you a drink? Water? Tea? Moonshine?”

What the…? “Moonshine?”

“Nah, just kidding. I hate the stuff. I don’t drink.”

Again words failed me. The naked man did pot but didn’t drink.

“Say….” He cocked his head. “Has anyone told you that you kinda look like….” He squinted and tapped his lip with his finger. “That actor guy. You know, the one back in the day…. He was in that terrible movie about the world being covered in water.”

I sighed. “Waterworld?”

His face lit up. “Yeah. Waterworld. God, that was bad. But he’s hot. What was his name?”

“Kevin Costner.”

Raymond slapped his thigh. “That’s it! You look like that guy.”

I’d been told that most of my life. It used to drive me crazy, as Kevin Costner had been six years older than I was. Now, it didn’t seem so bad. “Yep. I’ve heard that before.”

“Well, sexy, man. Sexy.”

I felt my cheeks heat. “You’re kinda sexy your—” I clamped my mouth shut. What the fuck was I saying!

“Oh, I know.” Raymond winked again and rubbed at the white chest hair visible in the deep V of the kimono. “Speaking of… why don’t you take some of your layers off. I keep it pretty warm in here.”

I actually lifted my hands to remove my hat before I caught myself. Or, actually, realized what was happening to my body. Beneath the layers of wool, felt, and thermal cotton, my erection had sprung to life. Like the fantasy of the naked neighbor was going to play out right here and right now.

The thought caused a spike of terror sharp enough to cool down my overheating body. Suddenly the layers offered protection more than suffocation. “Actually, I can’t stay. I… uhm….” What? I needed to go home and jack off and then try to remember how to actually talk to people. “I need to get home and make dinner.”

Raymond’s smile brightened once more. “Oh, perfect, I was just about to have dinner myself. Been making it all day in between taking out loads of my uncle’s shit. Figured if I’m going to work all Thanksgiving, I might as well have a good meal at the end.”

Thanksgiving. I’d forgotten. At some point last week, I’d remembered the holiday was coming up but then lost track of it again. Not like it really mattered. The realization that I’d forgotten stung. Almost enough to cause an ache in my chest. Silly, though. The years of Thanksgiving dinners surrounded by people I loved were long gone. Wow. “Thanks. I should probably get home, though.”

Just saying that hurt a bit. Huh, I wanted to stay.

When was the last time I’d wanted to be with someone for more than a minute? And now, I wanted to have Thanksgiving dinner with a magic-brownie-making stranger? Probably just seeing dick for the first time in a couple of years. I needed to get into the city and visit the bathhouse more frequently it seemed.

Home. I needed to get home.

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