was hoisting a few with the boys, he would be able to tell them how he had done his part to hold the line against the drugs-and-sex generation. Yessir, boys, I told em to get that fucking junk away from my house before I put a bang-shang-a-lang on them. And you want to believe they moved like their feet was on fire and their asses were catching. And then he would light up a Lucky. Or a Camel.
We put Amie's jack under the bumper. Arnie hadn't pumped the lever more than three times when the jack snapped in two. It made a dusty sound when it went, and rust puffed up. Arnie looked at me, his eyes at once humble and stricken.
'Never mind,'I said. 'We'll use mine.'
It was twilight now, starting to get dark. My heart was still beating too fast and my mouth was sour from the confrontation with the Big Cheese of 119 Basin Drive.
'I'm sorry, Dennis,' he said in a low voice. 'I won't get you involved with any of this again'
'Forget it. Let's just get the tyre on.'
We used my jack to get the Plymouth up (for several horrible seconds I thought the rear bumper was just going to rip off in a screech of decaying metal) and pulled the dead tyre. We got the new one on, tightened the lug-nuts some, and then let it down. It was a great relief to have the car standing on the street again; the way that rotted bumper bent up under the jack had scared me.
'There,' Arnie said, clapping the ancient, dented hubcap back on over the lug-nuts.
I stood looking at the Plymouth, and the feeling I'd had in LeBay's garage suddenly recurred. It was looking at the fresh new Firestone on the rear right that did it, The blackmail still had one of the manufacturer's stickers on it and the bright yellow chalk-marks from the gas-jockey's hurried wheel-balancing.
I shivered a little - but to convey the sudden weirdness I felt would be impossible. It was as if I had seen a snake that was almost ready to shed its old skin, that some of that old skin had already flaked away, revealing the glistening newness underneath.
Ralph was standing on his porch, glowering down at us. In one hand he was holding a drippy hamburger sandwich on Wonder Bread. His other hand was fisted around a can of Iron City.
'Handsome, ain't he?' I muttered to Arnie as I slung his busted jack into the Plymouth's boot.
'A regular Robert Deadford,' Arnie muttered back, and that was it - we both got the giggles, the way you sometimes will at the end of a long and tense situation,
Arnie threw the flat into the boot on top of the jack and then got snorting and holding his hands over his mouth. He looked like a kid who just got caught raiding the jam-jar. Thinking that made me break up all the way.
'What are you two punks laughing at?' Ralph roared. He came to the steps of his porch. 'Huh? You want to try laughing on the other sides of your faces for a while? I can show you how, believe me!'
'Get out of here quick,' I said to Arnie, and bolted back to my Duster. Nothing could stop the laughter now; it just came rolling out. I fell into the front seat and keyed the engine, whinnying with laughter. In front of me, Arnie's Plymouth started up with a bellowing roar and a huge stinking cloud of blue exhaust. Even over it, I could hear his high, helpless laughter, a sound that was close to hysteria.
Ralph came charging across his lawn, still holding his drippy burger and his beer.
'What are you laughing at, you punks? Huh?'
'You, you nerd!' Arnie shouted triumphantly, and pulled out with a rattling fusillade of backfires. I tromped the gas pedal of my own car and had to swerve sharply to avoid Ralph, who was now apparently intent on murder. I was still laughing, but it wasn't good laughter anymore, if it ever had been - it was a shrill, breathless sound, almost like screaming.
'I'll kill you, punk!' Ralph roared.
I goosed the accelerator again, and this time I almost tailgated Arnie.
I flipped Ralph the old El Birdo. 'Jam it!' I yelled.
Then he was behind us. He tried to catch up; for a few seconds he came pounding along the sidewalk, and then he stopped, breathing hard and snarling.
'What a crazy day,' I said aloud, a little frightened