I never thought this would happen. Yet now that we’re here, I can’t help but hate myself. I deprived my daughter of a father, and a father of his daughter. I’m trying not to be too hard on myself through this whole transition because what’s done is done, but I can’t help it. I look back now on those decisions and wonder who that person was? Why didn’t I say something sooner? Endymion and his parents are amazing people. Why ever did I think they would shoo me away?
“How are you doing?”
I turn at the sound of Endymion’s mom’s voice. Like me, she’s watching her son play with his daughter. When I look at her, there’s a wistful look on her face as she watches them run around together. I wonder how long she waited for her son to give her a grandchild? Did I deprive them, too?
“I’m hanging in there, trying not to hate myself,” I tell her, opting for honesty.
Aurora takes my hand in hers and squeezes reassuringly, sending shockwaves through my body. “Don’t beat yourself up, Selene. Endymion has always been…angry. About everything it seems like. Even as a kid, he hated change but got tired of routine, not a great combination. I’ve always been a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. I’d like to think maybe my son wouldn’t have been ready for this news all those years ago. Maybe it would’ve changed the course of his life forever? Just give him some time to process, and know, I understand. I am just glad she’s in our lives now.”
“Why are you being so nice to me?” I choke out, fighting back my tears. It suddenly feels like every emotion is clogged in my throat, blocking my airway. Luna calls to me from across the backyard, a huge grin on her face.
“Mommy, look at this!” she yells out, going back to playing with Endymion.
Aurora continues. “Because like it or not, we’re family now, Selene. And my son is an idiot. Even a blind person could see the way you looked at him, but he just…he’s always been too focused. He’s always reaching for the stars, and don’t get me wrong, that’s not a bad thing, but he never stopped to look at the star that was closest to him—the brightest one. I know he overlooked you, but don’t let it get to you now. I know you’re an amazing person. I know your heart. That isn’t going to change because you were gone for six years. It’s okay to put the past in the past and move forward.”
“I hate that I let my pride get in the way. I hate that after all these years I still feel stupid when I’m near him. I’m like that teenage girl all over again with a hopeless crush.”
“Men are dumb creatures by nature, honey. Don’t feel too bad.” I laugh and use my sleeve to get rid of the stray tears. “C’mon, let’s have some pie.”
We all settle around the table they have in their backyard while Aurora serves up slices of her delicious apple pie. It’s a town favorite. Always has been.
“So, Selene, Endymion and Luna were telling us that you’re getting little miss signed up for classes. First grade, how does it feel?”
“Like time is going by much too quickly,” I tell Ermias.
Endymion’s lips purse in disapproval, obviously not happy that he wasn’t able to be a part of her previous years. I deflate in my seat, feeling incredibly guilty. I can imagine it feels the same way for him—as though he’ll never have enough time with her because she’s growing way too fast.
“I heard through your dad that you’re now working at Rita’s?”
I nod, plastering an uncomfortable smile on my face. “It’s different. I haven’t worked customer service since I was in college, but since I’m out of work while here, I thought it’d be nice to pitch in with my dad, help him pay the bills. Maybe save enough to get my own place.”
This seems to make them happy. Aurora smiles. She reaches across the table and pats my hand. “You know, we’re actually going to have a barbecue here next weekend. I think you should come. I have a friend who is a realtor, and maybe you two can exchange numbers.”
“That sounds great.”
When night rolls around, Luna and I say our goodbyes. Endymion walks us to the car and buckles her in. I step away, giving them their privacy and hear them speaking