afraid to fail. I’m afraid I am not strong enough to serve Shyann. I’ve been weak my whole life and this power is new to me. I wonder if she picked the right person.”
Kiln laughed and shook his head. “Jonas, trust me. She picked the right man. You have a pure heart. I’ve been around fighting men my entire life, and believe me, she did not fail in her choice. You are on your way to being one of the best swordsmen I have ever seen, and you have powers that will get you through the tasks ahead. I can feel it.”
“Sir, do you have faith in the gods?”
Kiln paused for a moment before answering. “I have faith in myself and my friends, nothing more.”
“I see. Do you ever feel like praying?”
“Jonas, the gods are real, I will not deny that, but I question many things, all of which keep me from praying to anyone. I rely on myself. My success or failure will fall on my shoulders only. Praying means you are relying on others. That can be dangerous for a warrior. Do you understand?”
“I do, but what things do you question?” Jonas asked, leaning on the railing as he put on his cotton tunic.
“I question the gods’ motives. Who they are and what they want. The world we live in can be a terrible place. I have seen awful things and I wonder why the gods would allow it. Why does a poor farmer, who can barely feed his family, slaughter a lamb before and after the farming season as a gift to his god? Does his god require it? If so, why do they not help these people live a better life? There are many things about religion that makes no sense to me, Jonas.”
“Perhaps the gods don’t have the power to change everything.”
“Maybe, but why do the priests preach the opposite. And why do many of these same priests live a pampered life in their big temples paid for by the coin and sweat of the poor. The system is corrupt, Jonas, and I will not give my allegiance to a god that allows that to happen.”
“Maybe the gods don’t have total control over what happens here. Maybe corrupt men created the corrupt system, not the gods. Maybe the gods struggle to do right in this world, but their power is not inexhaustible. Or maybe they allow man to do as he will to test his character. Shyann is good. I can sense it, feel it, everything about her resonates hope and courage. Isn’t that something to believe in?”
“For you, yes, she chose you to help her. I believe she chose well. But there is no place in my heart for the gods. Besides, there are too many maybes in your argument. I believe in what I can see and hold in my hands, my friends, honor, courage, and my sword. I do not deny the god’s existence or their power, but their purpose and their role in our lives is unclear to me. And until I have clarity, I will continue to pray to no one.”
“I see. It is a difficult topic of discussion. As you said there are many unknowns when it comes to the gods. But I feel good about believing in something other than my sword and myself. I am Shyann’s ally against evil. Shyann’s purpose is linked to mine, I can sense it, and until I feel differently, my sword will uphold her will.”
“I respect your principles, Jonas. As I said, Shyann has chosen well.”
“Thank you, sir. I owe much to you. You have taught me things that I never dreamed of knowing.”
“I want to thank you too, Jonas,” Kiln replied.
“For what?”
“For awakening a part of me that was dead for many years. I tried to escape something that I couldn’t face. I tried to bury a part of me that has always burned like an ember deep in my soul. I am a warrior Jonas, pure and simple. My skills are being wasted away in this mountain retreat because I was not strong enough to face my fears. I do not want to die up here. I want to die with my sword in my hand. You have made me realize this, and I thank you for it.”
Jonas smiled warmly at Kiln, unaccustomed to seeing any hint of emotion in the hard man. “I knew you were not all ice and muscle,” grinned Jonas.