-Where's the job?" Lew pivoted, not just a turn of his head but of his whole body. He leaned against the windowsill. He watched his son, and Cadan knew he was being read, evaluated, and found wanting. It was an expression on his father's face he'd been looking at since he was six years old.
-Adventures Unlimited," he said. -I'm to do maintenance on the hotel till the season starts."
-What happens then?"
-If things work out, I'll do instruction." This last bit was a stretch, but anything was possible, and they were in the process of interviewing instructors for the summer, weren't they? Abseiling, cliff climbing, sea kayaking, swimming, sailing...He could do all of that, and even if they didn't want him in those activities, there was always freestyle BMX and his plans for altering the crazy golf course. He didn't mention this to his father, though. One word about the freestyle bicycle and Lew would read Ulterior Motives as if the words were tattooed on Cadan's forehead.
-‗If things work out.'" Lew blew a short breath through his nose, his version of a derisive snort, which said more than a dramatic monologue would have and all of it based upon the same subject. -How're you intending to get there, then? On that thing outside?" By which he meant the bike. -Because you won't be getting your car keys back from me, nor your driving licence.
So don't start thinking a job'll make a difference."
-I'm not asking for my keys back, am I?" Cadan said. -I'm not asking for my licence. I'll walk.
Or I'll ride the bike if I have to. I don't care what I look like. I rode it there today, didn't I?"
That breath again. Cadan wished his father would just say what he was thinking instead of always telegraphing it through facial expressions and not-so-subtle sounds. If Lew Angarrack just came out and declared, You're a loser, lad, Cadan would at least have something to row with him about: failures as son set against a different sort of failures as father. But Lew always took the indirect route, and this was one that generally used the vehicle of silence, heavy breathing, and - in a pinch - outright comparisons of Cadan and his sister. She was the sainted Madlyn, of course, a world-class surfer, headed for the top. Until recently, that is.
Cadan felt bad for his sister and what had happened to her, but a small, nasty part of him crowed in joy. For such a small girl, she'd been casting a large shadow for far too many years. He said,
-So that's it, then? No, ‗Good job of it, Cade,' or ‗Congratulations,' or even ‗Well, you've surprised me for once.' I find a job - and it's going to pay good money, by the way - but that's sod all to you because...what? It's not good enough? It's got nothing to do with surfing? It's - "
-You had a job, Cade. You cocked it up." Lew downed the rest of his coffee and took his mug to the sink. There, he scoured it out as he scoured out everything. No stains, no germs.
-That's bollocks," Cadan said. -Working for you was always a bad idea, and we both know that, even if you won't admit it. I'm not a detail person. I never was. I don't have the...I don't know...the patience or whatever."
Lew dried the mug and the spoon. He put them both away. He wiped down the scratched, old stainless-steel work top, although there wasn't a crumb upon it. -Your trouble is, you want everything to be fun. But life's not that way, and you don't want to see it."
Cadan gestured outside, towards the back garden and the surfing kit that his father had just rinsed off. -And that's not fun? You've spent all your free time for your entire life riding waves, but I'm supposed to see that as...what? Some noble endeavour like curing AIDS? Putting an end to world poverty? You give me aggro about doing what I want to do, but haven't you done the very same? But wait. Don't answer. I already know. What you do's all about grooming a champion.
Having a goal. While what I do - "
-There's nothing wrong with having a goal."
-Right. Yes. And I have mine. It's just not the same as yours. Or Madlyn's. Or what Madlyn's was."