The Caregiver - By Shelley Shepard Gray Page 0,17

join the group, Mattie’s mouth watered. “Do you think he’d mind going to the restaurant?”

“Not if he has time . . . and we offer to buy him his meal,” she said with a wink.

The door opened and a nurse stepped out. “Mattie, are you ready?”

Mattie stood up. “I am. I’ll be back soon, Mamm.”

“Don’t worry about me, dear. I’ll have plenty to do, as always.”

Mattie smiled weakly as her mother’s words rested in the air. She knew what her mother meant. She was going to spend the time praying while Mattie was with the doctor.

Praying, like she always did.

At one time, Mattie had believed that prayer did help. That prayers were answered. She’d believed that with all her heart.

Now, though, she knew differently.

Because if God had been guiding her every move, then for some reason He had decided that she needed to have cancer. If God had been with her, He wanted her to have a terrible scar. And to be having chemotherapy.

And if He wanted her to experience all of that, she wished He would tell her why.

She really had no idea what she had done to deserve it.

The last time Lucy had shared a meal in a restaurant with a man, it had been with Paul. They had gone to town on a Saturday morning. And because the weather was bright and sunny, Paul had suggested they eat at a nearby restaurant that had an outside patio. Of course, she hadn’t refused his offer. Her husband’s word had always been final.

Much of their time during the meal was spent in silence. Paul had been more interested in the other people dining around them. Often, he’d stood up and left. She’d sat alone and tried not to look like she minded, sitting there by herself.

After all, she’d known better than to behave any differently.

Now, as she walked next to Katie and Calvin on the sidewalk outside the train station, Lucy couldn’t help but think of how different the situation was. Katie, with her chatter and smiles, was making what would have been an awkward situation seem almost fun.

But it wasn’t Katie who Lucy kept thinking about.

Whenever she looked Calvin’s way or heard his voice, a tingly sort of awareness would appear inside her. She’d been always aware of Paul, too. But instead of stemming from fear, these new feelings were from the pleasure of Calvin’s company. It was as if her body knew exactly where he was and responded with breathlessness. He was so handsome, sturdy. Bigger than Paul. More muscular, too, but also a bit like a teddy bear. Paul’s body was wiry, like a fox.

Calvin exuded confidence. On the outside, he seemed as sure of himself as Paul had been. But Lucy was beginning to see that Calvin’s self-confidence wasn’t a wall to hide behind. No, it seemed to burn brightly from inside of him.

He was patient even while his eyes were curious and searching. He’d ask questions and was interested in her answers—and because of this Calvin didn’t feel overpowering to her.

Instead of chiding her for walking too slowly, as Paul always had, Calvin didn’t seem to mind waiting for her. Instead of getting mad at her for forgetting her quilt bag, he’d tried to help.

And now, when she stumbled next to him, he didn’t act as if the little misstep was a reflection on him. Instead, he held out an arm to catch her. To help her steady herself. It was all terribly courteous.

Though she had no need for another man in her life, her emotions and heart told a different story. After a year living as a widow, her senses were once again attuned to a man’s. But instead of feeling fear and worry when she looked at him, Lucy felt mesmerized.

“Ladies, you can order anything you’d like. My treat,” Calvin said when they’d received their menus at the diner.

“Yours and the train company’s,” Lucy corrected with a grin. “We each got a meal voucher.”

While he smiled right back, Katie started pointing to pictures on the menu. “What does all this say, Calvin?”

“It says you can have whatever you want, whenever you want it.” Patiently, he pointed to a picture of pancakes. “See? They serve pancakes all day here.”

“I wish we did that at home,” Katie said. “I like pancakes all the time.”

After they ordered, and Lucy was enjoying her hot coffee, Calvin leaned forward. “You know what? It just occurred to me that I never asked why you were traveling to Cleveland.