He throws himself beside me and my hands slap against the sheets.
I jerk my head to the side to glare at him, but he’s covering his face with his arm.
“Are you serious right now?” I complain, and he lifts his arm slightly to glare at me before dropping it back down.
I growl and shoot from the bed.
I pull out another joint I pre-rolled and throw myself into the chair.
When the lighter sparks he jerks upright.
“We said no drugs.”
“Yeah, well...” I inhale, turning toward him to blow it out. I glare. “Oops.”
He scoots to the edge of the mattress and I scoff when he shifts to adjust his hard-on in his pants.
I look out the window and after a few minutes of silence my shoulders sag and I drop my head back.
“Raven.” Where before, his demand was imbued with carefulness, this time it’s firm.
Fucking whatever.
I exhale, watching the smoke rise above me before floating out into the night. “How is it, a royal piece of shit like my mother, who hates her daughter, gets to keep me for seventeen years before someone steps in, but someone like Captain, who wants nothing more than to love his child, to hold her every day and show her what she means to him, can’t have his for even a night? How does that happen? How is that acceptable?”
“It’s not.”
I shake my head, unable to forget the way the little girl smiled at her daddy. I blink hard. “The system sucks.”
“Raven.”
“Stop.” I close my eyes, a deep crease taking over my forehead before I can stop it. “Don’t say it.”
“What you did today...”
“I said don’t.”
“For us, for Captain. Your need to ease him in a way we can’t.”
I roll my neck to the side, to meet his stare.
While unease lines his eyes, gratefulness shapes his features.
“It’s not a big deal.”
“You’re wrong.” He frowns. “It is a big deal. Real fucking big deal.”
I look away.
“We’re not sure how to handle you.”
I frown at the cherry of my joint. “That’s how I like it, big man.”
“I don’t care what you like. This is our fucking future and you just became a problem.”
“Became a problem. Right.” I give him a blank stare. “I didn’t become anything. I’ve been the problem and you know it. Now I’m just more dangerous to you because in your world blackmail is a way of life. Well in mine, we don’t rat. We don’t share detail. When we learn, hear, or see things we turn the other way.”
“That’s a fool’s way of thinking.”
“That’s a smart man’s way of surviving,” I bite back. “Life isn’t this simple outside your comfort covered issues. You may not have answers to everything, but you have way more than most, Maddoc, and more than the house and the cars and the money, you have Royce and Captain, and they have you. Your side and your back are covered. People like me? We have to sleep with one eye open. I don’t need enemies, so why would I make one out of you three?”
“Money.”
“Please.” I roll my eyes at his attempt to reach for straws. “I can make money at the snap of a finger if I needed to and you know it.” It’s disgusting but true.
He glares.
I lean toward him.
“Don’t let this mixed up sexual tension we’ve got going make you forget. My being here? That was all you three. You owe me nothing, if you need me to go, tell me and I will.”
He leans forward this time, his teeth bared as he growls more than talks. “You still don’t get it, do you?”
“What’s there to get?”
“We want you here more than we should. All fucking three of us. Maybe even enough to force you to stay if you try to leave.”
When my eyes widen, he stomps to the door, but pauses and turns back to me before exiting.
Anger now acts as his shield and his eyes bore into mine. “Touch me again when you’re fighting to forget something, and you’ll regret it.” He leaves.
I drop back against the chair and shake my head.
His words are delivered as a threat, but I know better.
Seems big man wants my all and my not laughing over it proves what a dumb girl I’ve become.
I need to break away, distance myself and get my head straight.
Even thinking it I know it’s a bad idea, but most of mine are so ... fuck it.
Since tonight was an away game, more people than last time