The Boy Who Has No Hope (Soulless #6) - Victoria Quinn Page 0,71

so he could look at me again, his hand returning to my waist.

Without thinking, I spoke my mind. “You can have any woman you want…and I’m not your type. How did this happen? And why does it feel so right?” I used to call him my friend, and that was true, but in reality, he had always been much more. I just wouldn’t allow myself to acknowledge it, to admit that I’d found the perfect man and he would never be mine.

He stared at me for a long time, taking one of those extended pauses that stretch for an eternity. His dark eyes looked into mine like he was reading my thoughts in companion to the words I’d already spoken. “They aren’t my type. I was only with those kinds of women because I didn’t want anything real. They aren’t thinking about marriage and kids, anything serious. And I certainly didn’t want anything serious either. It’s just easier that way. But with you…I’m ready to feel again. I need someone who satisfies me intellectually, understands my complexity, who accepts me as I am, and knows I think differently than other people. Beautiful women are a dime a dozen. But a beautiful soul is a diamond in the rough. You are smart, beautiful, unique…and that is my type.”

It was such a romantic thing to say, to have a beautiful man who wanted me for more than my looks, that everything I had underneath was more than enough to compete with the younger women he usually preferred. It drove away my self-consciousness, made me less insecure. Not only was I nearly a decade older than Fleur, but I had a child…and I still had scars from the child. Most men would think I was damaged goods.

I noticed that Derek was dramatically different from the moment we made love. Even when he’d told me he wanted to be with me on the couch, he’d spoken like we were having a business meeting. But once our naked bodies came together, he became a whole new person. He was affectionate, warm, visibly happy. It was as if our intimacy took down the final walls around his heart. “You said you were in a relationship ten years ago?”

His eyes moved down slightly, like that was a topic that bothered him. “Yes.”

“What happened?”

He didn’t pull his head away, but the warm affection in the air started to wane. He took another long pause, but this one was so long, it didn’t seem like he was going to give me an answer. “I don’t want to talk about the past. It doesn’t matter anymore. I’m with you now, and there was never anyone before worth mentioning.”

I didn’t think that was an acceptable answer when he was so angry about Lizzie’s existence, but I didn’t pry. He obviously didn’t want to talk about it now, but in time, I was certain he would feel differently. “We only have about forty minutes… What do you want to do?”

The warmth returned to his expression, and his arms tightened around me to bring me close, turning anxious. “You know what I want to do.”

Derek stuck to his dark jeans and gray hoodie, not interested in dressing up for his televised appearance. He never put a lot of thought into his clothing, definitely wasn’t a fancy dresser, but it didn’t matter when his strong physique filled out his clothes and made him naturally magnetic. He was such a beautiful man, and it really didn’t matter what he wore.

He met a few people backstage and then had a conversation with Dr. Salazar. The audience filed in, and their voices were audible from where we stood backstage. I didn’t have a lot of purpose other than offering support, so I was quiet most of the time.

The two of us were alone together backstage, standing side by side while Dr. Salazar sat in the armchair on the stage and did a few technical checks.

I stared at the side of Derek’s face, trying to decipher his feelings. He was a stoic man, so he wasn’t always easy to read. Since no one was around, my hand moved to his arm, and I came close. “You’re gonna do great. I’m not worried in the least.”

Without looking at me, he moved his arm around my waist, and he pulled me to him. The stage crew walked around and could see us sharing affection, but Derek didn’t care. He turned his head to me and looked down slightly to meet